


Luckier Thirteen

by agentsimmons



Series: Yours. Mine. Ours. [14]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Adoption, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Awkward Crush, Background Betty/Leonard, Background Pepper/Happy - Freeform, Bisexual Brunnhilde | Valkyrie (Marvel), Bisexual Tony Stark, Domestic, Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, Family, Family Drama, Family Feels, Family Fluff, Fluff, Gay Bruce Banner, Grey-A Natasha, Kid Brunnhilde | Valkyrie (Marvel), Kid Clint Barton, Kid Fic, Kid Jemma Simmons, Kid Loki (Marvel), Kid Natasha Romanov, Kid Peter Parker, Kid Pietro Maximoff, Kid Sam Wilson, Kid Skye | Daisy Johnson, Kid Steve Rogers, Kid Thor (Marvel), Kid Wanda Maximoff, Large Families, M/M, Minor Steve Rogers/Sam Wilson, Not Canon Compliant, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Parent Bruce Banner, Parent Tony Stark, Parent-Child Relationship, Parenthood, Past Character Death, Past Tony Stark/Maya Hansen, Romantic Fluff, Science Boyfriends, Secret Crush, Siblings, Step-siblings, The Super Sized Science Family, Unconventional Families
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-13
Updated: 2018-12-12
Packaged: 2019-08-17 16:17:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 27,651
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16519883
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/agentsimmons/pseuds/agentsimmons
Summary: A lot of things have changed for Tony Stark, Bruce Banner, and their many (many) kids over the past year and a half, but their life together as a family has only just begun. Assuming nothing prevents the two geniuses from saying, “I do.”





	1. Another Day in the Life of Tony Stark, Genius Billionaire Philanthropist Father Fiancé

**Author's Note:**

>  
> 
> Rest In Peace Stan Lee.  
> 
> 
> This series is officially three years old! So I just couldn't wait anymore no matter how hard I tried. I have been working on a multi chapter sequel for some time. Since I'm finally nearly-finished and have been mostly in the final editing stage, here is the first chapter. I hope everyone enjoys this next journey for the super sized science family. 

"Hell of a view."

"Well, it's no porch in Willowdale, but it's a close second."

Tony smiled and crossed the expanse of his office, depositing two venti sized drinks onto his desk as he did, until he reached his fiancé. He wrapped his arms around Bruce's waist and craned his head to place a kiss on the bit of Bruce's exposed neck he could reach. A strong scent of fresh aftershave filled his lungs.

"I meant you," Tony murmured before straightening his head to look out the window, seeing Bruce's contented reflection in the tinted glass, "but I suppose the Manhattan skyline is a close second."

Bruce gave a soft laugh and craned his own head to look back at him with a smile. Tony accepted the look of invitation in Bruce's expression and kissed him. Bruce gave a quiet hum when they broke apart and looked back out the window, moving his hands to rest on Tony's at his waist.

"Any catastrophes I should know about?" Bruce asked after a few quiet moments.

"Natasha didn't come to breakfast and when I went to check on her, I got an earful in Russian," Tony answered with the most pressing matter. "I'm still not sure if she realizes I speak Russian," he added as an afterthought. 

"Probably time to consider extraction," Bruce said with a sigh. "Maybe the dentist can take out the others too."

"I gave the dentist office a call on the ride here," Tony nodded, "and was told they likely would since that's the usual procedure these days. She has an appointment for this afternoon to have it looked at. If you're too tired, I can take her."

Bruce turned in his arms, wrapping his own around Tony's middle in tandem. He smiled at him, the small smile that Tony knew was the one that specifically meant he was pleased with him. 

"I think I'd like to be there with her," Bruce said, "not that you can't tag along if you want."

"When it comes to the dentist, two is better than one," Tony replied.

Bruce gave a soft chuckle. "I never realized how true that is until Peter's last exam."

Tony winced as he remembered it. Peter had been lucky to never have any cavities until recently and the new experience, particularly the needle in his mouth, had not been one he liked. He had panicked while sitting in the chair. 

"Anything else?" Bruce quizzed, interrupting the memory. 

Tony puffed out his cheeks and rolled his eyes upward in exaggerated consideration. "Well, Clint declared he's joining a circus," he joked.

"He'd probably make a good aerial acrobat," Bruce replied with a snort. "Or maybe a trick performer with his bow."

"That's true," Tony agreed. "But, no, nothing too much," he answered the question more seriously. "I think the highlight was Steve stopping by to drop off some of the decorations he finished for Jemma's party. And some laundry too," he added with a chuckle.

"Aww, I missed him?" Bruce's tone was genuinely regretful and Tony tried not to roll his eyes.

Instead he hugged Bruce a little closer and said, "Babe, he'll be home again Friday night."

"I know," Bruce nodded, "but—"

"And he hasn't even been gone for more than a week at a time since the semester started," Tony continued, interrupting him. "What with you always encouraging him to bring home his laundry or stop by for a free meal."

Bruce sighed and glanced down. "Alright, so maybe I'm still getting used to the whole not having him around every single day thing."

Tony's expression softened. "And that's fair. I'm just trying to put it in perspective before you can make yourself too sad. You'll only have to wait a couple days longer to see him again. And what you were doing here with your team was important. He understood that when I explained where you were." Tony accompanied his words with reassuring caresses. "Every now and then work _can_ come first."

Bruce pulled back and gave him a dubious look. "I'll be sure to remind you of this when Clint is gone weeks at a time with the circus," he said flatly.

Tony chuckled. "I hope you do since I'll probably need it," he said in earnest.

"Oh god," Bruce exclaimed, "but that reminds me I'm losing two more of mine compared to your one—" He started to lament, but Tony wouldn't let him finish no matter how overwhelming the truth was, which Tony could admit was _very_ overwhelming. Clint, Thor and Loki would all be starting their senior year the following day and he was just as reluctant to see it happen as Bruce was. 

"Hey, shh." Tony leaned forward, touching his forehead to Bruce's. "I'm guessing this isn't the best topic of discussion for a guy that's probably only had a couple of hours of sleep. Am I right?" Bruce nodded gently, rocking Tony's head a little with the motion. "Right. So how about we deal with _our_ dwindling nest at a later date, okay?"

" _Our_ ," Bruce repeated with another nod.

Bruce's agreement made Tony's heart expand. He might not have had Bruce's kids in his life as long as him, or vice versa, but that didn't mean they wouldn't be sorely missed by both men as the chaos of thirteen gradually lessened.

"And I'm sure by time your little molecule is a senior, we'll have at least one grandkid to spoil rotten as a distraction," Tony pointed out. "I mean, the odds are in our favor, right?"

Bruce choked on a laugh that sounded suspiciously like a tiny sob. "Probably. But you mean _o_ _ur_ little molecule," he said, pulling back and looking at Tony with a small, watery smile.

"Yes," Tony agreed with a wide smile, his heart swelling impossibly more at Bruce offering him the honor of sharing the nickname with him.

"Oh, and speaking of our little molecule," Tony suddenly recalled, "I had a thought while we were rereading _Alice In Wonderland_ last night and I had JARVIS make a quick inquiry. If it's not too short of notice, we might be able to rent a bunny petting zoo for the party. I thought it would fit the motif pretty well and, honestly, I think she'd be thrilled by that kind of surprise. Not to mention the adorable pictures and video we'd get out of—"

Tony's longwinded suggestion was cut short as Bruce's lips found his, the kiss messy and frantic and a little salty as a few tears slipped down the other man's cheeks. "I love you," Bruce breathed as he attacked Tony's lips over and over again. "God, I love you."

Tony moaned and pressed Bruce back against the window, deepening the kiss. Neither seemed inclined to break the kiss any longer than a few seconds when air became necessary. 

Maybe it was because Tony had spent half the night wishing he could have been burning the midnight oil here in the labs with Bruce - preferably without the other members of Bruce's team of course. Maybe it was because he wanted the physical reminder that they weren't really losing anything because these were _their_ kids now. This was _their_ life. For better. For worse. Forever.

Whatever the reason, Tony was three seconds away from begging Bruce to let their sudden contact escalate right there against the open window of his office, regardless of the time the day. Unfortunately, he was three seconds too late in making the request known before it had to be given up because there was the sound like a slap of paper against a hard surface, startling them from their heated entanglement. 

Tony scowled when he turned his head to see the culprit. She was standing near his desk with her arms folded, one eyebrow arched, and a tiny smirk on her face. 

"Jeez, Pepper," he complained. "What's the idea of interrupting?"

"I'm sorry," she replied in a tone that belied she wasn't really. "I wasn't aware HR changed its policy on this kind of fraternization during working hours."

"You realize just because HR doesn't find out, doesn't mean there isn't any fucking going on around here during working hours, right?" Tony pointed at her, still scowling.Bruce left his embrace completely and moved to sit in Tony's chair, Tony watching him go with an inward sigh. He then looked back at the cause of it. "Hell, pretty sure I overheard a quickie in the gym locker rooms a couple of weeks ago."

Pepper returned his scowl at that.

"No, Pepper's right," Bruce interjected, a grimace in his voice. He took a sip of his drink and studied something on Tony's desk with a furrowed brow. "It's inappropriate."

"Thank you, Bruce," Pepper said with a huff of exasperation. "At least I can count on one of you."

"Well," Bruce shrugged, "most of the time."

He gave Tony a quick, coy glance that melted his scowl immediately. Tony had a sneaking suspicion that Bruce meant he might have let things escalate more than usual had Pepper not barged in.

"Well, if that’s inappropriate, then I'm not sure I want to be appropriate," Tony countered breezily. He was curious to see what Bruce had been looking at, moving to look for himself. His eyes widened when he saw the tabloid and glanced between it and Pepper a few times. "Really? Now we can't even go to Vegas without people speculating?"

She only shrugged.

"To be fair," Bruce said as he put down his drink and picked up the magazine, no doubt to flip through it to the salacious column depicted by their picture on the cover, "the kids asked us the same thing. And I'm not even sure Clint is convinced yet that we _didn't_ get married while we were there and aren't just pranking them by saying we didn't," he added with a chuckle and shake of his head.

Tony scoffed, "And risk the combined wrath of at least half of our brood who want us to have some huge shindig?"

"Uh oh," Pepper toned with a slight giggle in her voice, "careful, Bruce. He's got a dangerous gleam in his eyes."

Bruce snorted and glanced up at him, "That's because what he really means is _he_ wants us to have some huge shindig." He then sighed and passed the magazine to him.

Tony glanced over the offensively small blurb speculating that his and Bruce's mostly mundane two-day trip to Vegas for an energy seminar may have been accompanied by a trip to a chapel. He raised his eyebrow at the source at the end claiming, "The two men were overheard talking about marriage and definitely acted like they might be on their honeymoon."

"Wait, when did we talk about marriage?" Tony queried as he racked his own memory.

"Remember the drunk guy there for his bachelor party?"

Tony gave Bruce's question a long thought before it returned to him. "Oh yeah. The chatty one in the elevator who couldn't stop going on about his fiancé and how he wished he was married already."

"You humored him with a comment about how you could relate. One of his sober buddies must be the source." Bruce hitched a shoulder and took another drink. A smirk crept up over the top of the lid and he added, "But you might have blacked all of that out after that other guy made a pass at me."

Pepper's eyes widened and she raised a hand to her mouth as she gasped, "No?" Bruce nodded at her and then they both looked at Tony in amusement.

Tony blinked several times as the small snippet of awkward conversation before Bruce's encounter returned to him, followed by anger at the drunk bastard as he remembered him too. He looked at Bruce incredulously.

"Okay, you and I have very different definitions of making a pass. The guy was practically humping you like some animal."

Bruce made a choking sound. " _That_ is an exaggeration. I barely had to touch him for him to stumble back. I was more uncomfortable with the smell of alcohol than anything, as I've already told you at least a dozen times now," he tacked on with a roll of his eyes.

"I still say we should have reported him just in case he tried it again with anyone else," Tony replied obstinately. "I'm starting to think you enjoyed it," he added, narrowing his eyes.

Bruce barked out an incredulous laugh at his teasing. "Seriously? You were there. It was like...like a sloppy kiss from a toddler," he said with a shiver. Tony laughed too. "There's no way you can actually convince yourself that I'd prefer that to what I already have, not with _your_ ego," he jabbed, "and in this case, you'd be right."

Tony dropped the magazine on the desk and leaned down so that he was about eye level with Bruce. "Right, because it's never at all flattering when a hot, young guy finds you attractive."

"You thought he was hot?" Bruce asked with a raised brow, not even missing a beat.

"Busted," Pepper chimed in. Sometimes Tony got the feeling she liked Bruce more than him in spite of their far longer friendship.

"You know," Tony coughed, "I don't actually think I got a good look at him, what with the seeing red. Seeing red because I love you. And can't wait to marry you. Remember that?"

"Ugh, please, Bruce," Pepper teased, "give him reprieve or he'll keep it up."

Bruce snorted softly and rolled his eyes. "Alright," he said and pulled Tony's head the rest of the way down to give him a quick kiss. "Besides, he _was_ kind of hot." Tony gave a scandalized gasp before swallowing Bruce's accompanying giggle.

"Alright, you two," Pepper interrupted and Tony pulled back with a groan. "Sorry," she said, again not sounding very apologetic, "but somebody around here needs to act as the CEO. So, unless Bruce is up for the job or I was given a promotion nobody told me about, there's a zoning meeting this morning, in case you forgot—"

"I didn't," Tony retorted, but the look Bruce gave him said he knew better.

"Also, we managed to get a phone call with a delegate from Wakanda so you absolutely cannot miss that," Pepper continued through the itinerary for the day. "And thanks to an awkward elevator ride in Vegas, now PR is being bombarded with inquiries including from the Board. No pressure, but you'll need to meet with them as soon as possible to discuss whether or not it's time to make an official announcement."

Tony glanced quickly at Bruce to gauge his reaction before saying, "Which is something we will need to thoroughly discuss first. I don't think we can promise anything definite until next week."

Bruce hummed and nodded, "Because it's not just us. We'll need to discuss it with the kids."

Pepper nodded her understanding. "I'll let them know to maintain their ignorance a little while longer."

"And since I don't plan on taking over CEO duties today," Bruce stood to his feet, taking his drink with him, 'I'd say this is my cue to leave." He gave Tony a quick peck as he passed.

"Speaking of, shouldn't you be on your way home already?" Pepper asked him. "HR is pretty strict about those long hours."

"Since I had the luxury of the penthouse, I sent the others home and promised them I'd give the simulations another look in the morning," he said. "I just stopped in here after, but I'm calling it a day. Honest." He held up his hands as if in surrender.

"Alright," Pepper said. "Because until you have certain official perks, I can't bend the rules that much for you."

"Wouldn't dream of it," Bruce replied and Tony knew well enough that he meant it. Bruce moved to the door only to stop and turn back. "Oh, when is Tasha's appointment?"

"1:45," Tony answered. "Do you want to hang out in the penthouse some more until I'm done or do you want me to meet you at home?"

Bruce looked at Pepper. "When is the Wakanda call?" he asked.

Tony smiled. Bruce was starting to insert himself more with business matters. Tony wasn't sure if he was forcing himself to do so or if it was starting to come naturally. He didn't mind either way.

"11," she answered, a small twinkle in her eyes that Tony suspected was owed to a similar thought to his own. "He should be fine to leave after that."

 

* * *

 

"Really?" Tony's eyebrows climbed higher on his forehead. "That's amazing. Maybe she would like to head up a subsidiary based in Wakanda. Make history as one of the world's youngest CEOs," he offered.

The man on the other side of the line gave a small chuckle. "It would be a subsidiary of one. She is a little bit stubborn and independent still."

Tony smiled. "Well, so am I." He glanced at his watch before adding, "But in all seriousness, I would love the chance to talk to her. As a father of brilliant children, I have a bit of a soft spot for them. And I'm sure my own kids would love to meet her. But I understand that's an entirely different matter of protocol and all."

"I will make it known just the same. It has been a pleasure speaking with you, Mr. Stark. I will give you an answer on your original inquiry as soon as I have discussed it with his majesty, King T'Chaka."

"The pleasure is mine," Tony offered his own pleasantries in return, although they weren't fake as it had been a very good conversation. "Thank you for your time. I look forward to hearing from you."

As soon as the call was ended, Tony began preparing to leave. The call had gone a little bit longer than he'd expected, but there was still plenty of time to join Bruce. Before he could turn off his computer, however, a notification alerted him to an incoming video call.

Tony scowled. He knew he should ignore it, but he answered anyhow.

"I thought I told you to stop calling me," he said directly.

"Relax, Tony, I come with a fig leaf."

"Jesus, Hammer, you can't even get your colloquialisms right. It's olive branch."

"Whatever," Hammer brushed off the comment, "the point is, I'm calling to see if the recent gossip is true. Did you and Dr. Banner get hitched?"

Tony resisted the urge to roll his eyes. Instead he asked, "Why? Do you have a wedding gift for us?"

Hammer gave an ugly sounding laugh and Tony followed up his prior urge. "That's funny, Stark," Hammer finally said. "We both know there isn't anything I could possibly get you that you don't already have or couldn't get for yourself if you really wanted it."

"True," Tony conceded, glancing at his watch again.

"Oh, I'm sorry," Hammer said, tone anything but apologetic, "am I keeping you from something important? I didn't know you still had serious deadlines now that you don't have any government contracts."

"One, I don't have any _military_ contracts. The government is just fine with getting its hands on other tech. Two, I don't think the guy who is notoriously late on almost all of his promised projects has any right to wonder about how I'm using my time." Hammer frowned for the first time since the call began. "As it happens, though, I have a family errand I need to get to. So, yes, it's important."

Hammer's frown turned back up into his previous smarmy smile. "Oh, well, that is important. So Justin will keep it short and simple for you."

Tony really wanted to roll his eyes again. At the least he knew he would need to swallow a couple of aspirin as soon as the call was finished.

"If the good news is true, then Mazel Tov. Oh, and also, maybe let Dr. Banner know that if it goes south and you kick him out, Hammer Tech has a couch he can use." He smiled a weaselly smile. "Welp, see you at the next charity, Tony."

The other CEO ended the call before Tony could respond, not that he could justify any of his comments with a response. Some people just genuinely were twerps and nothing could be said or done to change it. Justin Hammer was one of those people. But something about his call, and his comments, disconcerted Tony more than usual.

 

* * *

 

The shrill cry of a child pierced the relative silence in the waiting room, startling Tony from his game of _Words With Friends_ with Jemma. He looked down at the girl beside him to see she'd startled too. Her eyes were wide and blinking as the crying continued.

Finally she looked up at him and said, "That doesn't sound good."

It dawned on Tony that the last thing Jemma needed was to develop a fear of dentists like her older brother.

"Maybe your sister bit the dentist," he suggested, lowering his voice to a whisper.

Jemma giggled. "Poor dentist," she joked back.

It wasn't Natasha's wisdom teeth like he and Bruce had suspected, rather a small cavity that had been hiding from the X-Ray during her last check-up. Thankfully, it could be remedied with a quick filling. Had it been her wisdom teeth, Tony wasn't quite sure his comment would be merely a joke. Bruce had shared with him that the teen was extremely triggered by anesthetics. 

"Speaking of dentists," Tony decided to distract Jemma, "want to hear a story about the first tooth that Clint lost?" Her head moved up and down several times, eyes widening again. "Well, he hadn't been six years old for very long. His mom needed to go to the doctor so I stayed home to watch Clint and his younger siblings. At the time, that was Skye, Wanda, Pietro, and Darcy. Sam was staying with us for a little bit too." He paused and she nodded as if to urge him to continue. He smiled before doing so. "Okay, so I'm at home with six kids and I'd just gotten Darcy to sleep for a nap since she was an itty bitty thing then, not even a year old," he explained, "and all of a sudden I hear a really loud crash followed by a scream."

Jemma gasped and asked, "What happened?"

"Sam and Clint were playing this silly game where they were pretending like the floor—"

"Is lava?" Jemma cut in over him.

"That's the one." He nodded. Then, with a raised eyebrow, asked, "You've played it?"

"Of course. _Everyone_ plays that game," she answered in a somewhat patronizing tone.

"Right," Tony chuckled, "well, they were playing that game and I guess Clint decided to prove that he could jump across a whole canyon. Only the canyon was really from a couch to a coffee table that him and Sam had pushed too far away."

"Oh," she toned, no doubt deducing where he was going with the story.

"Now, if JARVIS had been as smart as he is now, he'd probably have stopped him or told me so I could, but I was still working on him so he couldn't really look out for us the way he does now," Tony continued the story. "Which means Clint jumped and he almost made it. Unfortunately, the almost part meant he ended up losing his footing and hitting his mouth against the coffee table instead."

"Ouch."

"Yes, ouch. I freaked out and hurried back to the other room to find out what had happened. My heart is racing and I'm already sure that his mother is going to kill me," she giggled at his emotive retelling, "and there's blood. So much blood. You know how it bleeds a little when you lose a tooth?" She nodded. "It was so much more blood than that," he told her. "Sam is freaking out and Clint is screaming in pain of course. And Skye, she comes toddling along to see what's going on and gets scared because she's only three at the time. So she starts crying, afraid her bubby is hurt. And that gets Wanda and Pietro crying in their playpen across the room. And I still have Darcy in my arms, who starts crying angrily at being woken up." 

Jemma's eyes grew wider and wider with every turn of the story until he paused for a breath and she said, "That sounds terrible."

"It was. And, you see, it was my first time as a dad handling a lost tooth so I had no idea what to do. I was panicking and trying to calm everyone down and clean up the blood." He had to chuckle as it all came back to him clear as day, tinged less with sadness than old memories used to be, and more with humor. "And, so of course, that's exactly when their mother comes home and finds me practically on the floor crying along with the kids."

Jemma giggled some more. "Was she mad?"

"At first she was just shocked and confused. Then she was worried about the blood so while I calmed down the younger kids she took care of Clint. _Then_ she got mad." Jemma's eyes widened again. "See, I shouldn't have let the boys play that game if I knew I wasn't going to be around to supervise. And Clint and Sam were given a stern talking to about doing things that are dangerous." He smiled as the rest of the memory played out in his mind. "But after that she stopped being mad and laughed instead. She said that it had looked like a scene out of a cartoon or something. It probably did."

"It does sound like a cartoon," Jemma agreed. "I'm glad I've never lost a tooth that way."

"Well, it wasn't all bad," Tony continued, "and actually has a really sweet ending."

"Really? What?"

"The next day his mom had big news to share. She was going to have another baby."

"Oh! Harley! That's why she went to the doctor?"

"Exactly. And you know what Clint said? He said, 'Wow, the tooth fairy brought me a dollar _and_ a baby brother.' Of course he didn't know that it would be a brother for sure, but I guess he was right," he said with a hitch of his shoulder, smiling through a small lump in his throat.

"Awww," Jemma responded.

And to think his little boy was about to be a senior, the thought struck him suddenly. Now he understood Bruce's reaction to having missed Steve. Clint wasn't even out of the house yet and he already needed that reminder Bruce had promised him.

"I absolutely agree with you, Jemma," Bruce said, as if summoned by Tony's thoughts. He turned his gaze to where Bruce and Natasha stood nearby. "That was a very sweet thing for Clint to say."

"I should remind him of it," Natasha said, although her words were a little incoherent where they'd numbed her left cheek.

"Don't even think about it," Bruce warned her. "Not unless you want me to share an incriminating photo from the blackmail box."

"Not fair," Natasha protested, scowling when the exclamation gave her the need to wipe her mouth with her sleeve. "That can't still be a thing. It's not just us anymore."

"Oh, don't worry about that," Tony said as he stood to his feet. "Your dad and I have been discussing reinstating the blackmail box in general. And there will be plenty of Stark items to add to it."

"We're going to need a bigger box," Natasha mumbled, rolling her eyes.

"Probably," Bruce said with a laugh. "Now, if you're done with the teen angst, how about we head home. School starts in the morning and—"

"And we have hats to decorate!" Jemma interjected.

"That's right," Tony cheered along with her, "we have hats to decorate."

 

* * *

 

"Dude! Not cool!" Harley complained. "You got purple glitter on my hat! Now I'm going to have to start another one!"

"I'm sorry, did you say you wanted me to add _more_ purple glitter to your boring hat?" Clint heckled and started shaking his container of glitter over the hat.

"Oh yeah?" Harley grabbed some jewel stickers. "I'm going to add a bunch of hearts to yours!"

Tony looked up from one of the hats he was working on to see the two boys playing keep away with their hats, while of course also trying to mess with the other's. Jemma was determined that everyone, not only herself and the friends she had invited, should have party hats. But even with a practical army it was more chaos than productivity and Tony had a feeling they wouldn't end up finishing the sheer number of extras they needed to make in order for that to be possible. While he didn't mind the horseplay, it wasn't conducive to getting the task done. 

"How about," he interjected, "making a hat together with purple glitter and hearts?"

"And for Freyja's sake, keep your sparkly herpes away from me," Loki drawled, scooting away from Clint.

"Who's Freyja?" Peter asked. "I thought it was For God's Sake."

Loki didn't answer, rather just rolled his eyes.

"Freyja is a goddess. She is the wife of Odin," Thor answered the question with the long-suffering his brother lacked, "the supreme deity in Norse mythology."

"Oh, I know who Odin is," Peter replied. Then, scrunching his nose he said, "I just didn't know he had a wife."

"Typical," Natasha and Skye said in unison.

"Why don't we ever learn about badass women in school?" Skye continued. "Not even the mythological ones?"

"Right?" Jane agreed. "Like, I love Madame Curie, but she wasn't the _only_ brilliant female mind in science."

"And we barely even learn about her," Wanda pointed out. 

"Not to undermine your rant against the patriarchy," Loki chimed in again, "but we're stuck learning about the same boring men over and over again when there are plenty of interesting ones to choose from."

Tony frowned and glanced at Bruce to see a similar reaction. It seemed even S.H.I.E.L.D. Academy wasn't immune to defeciencies in curriculum.

"Did you know," Jemma chimed in with an eagerness in her voice, "that there was a lady named Annie Londonderry who biked around the whole world even when people said women couldn't?"

There were several nugatory responses from the others at the table. Jemma nodded, bouncing in her seat. Tony suspected she was pleased to know something the bigger kids didn't and his previous frown quickly turned upward.

"Yeah!" Jemma exclaimed. "I found a book about her at the library and, and, she ended up riding a man's bike and stopped wearing a dress because it was slowing her down."

"Nice," Natasha said.

"That wasn't the only prejudice she faced," Bruce chimed in. "Not only was she an immigrant, Londonderry was a fake last name because her married name was very Jewish, something that would make people treat her even worse."

"Wow," Skye said. "And yet we learn about the same dead guys every year. Like Loki said, there's not even any variation on the dead guys. High schools should at least offer, like, I don't know, a women's history class as an elective. We shouldn't have to wait to college."

"Well, you know," Bruce started tentatively and Tony lifted an eyebrow, guessing he had something up his sleeve, "you could always bring it up to Principal Fury."

Skye's eyes widened and Tony smiled at the way her entire face lit up at the idea.

"Oh my god, you're right. I totally could! And then I could springboard it into, like, a state or national campaign demanding for more equity of the genders in curriculum."

"You could," Tony approved wholeheartedly.

"Make sure it's intersectional," Wanda commented.

"Of course," Skye said with a scoff and shrug.

"It would be super awesome!" Darcy encouraged.

"It would," Jane agreed.

"I'd definitely support that," Natasha added.

"Me too!" Jemma said. "Even if I'm not really sure what we're talking about now," she added with a scrunched up face and giggle.

Those who did understand laughed along with her.

Bruce cut a ribbon for her as he explained, "Skye wants to start a petition for schools to teach about more famous women than they do right now."

"Oh, then _definitely_ me too," Jemma said in adamant agreement as she took the ribbon. Then, completely changing the subject, she said, "You haven't made your hat yet, daddy."

"Well, I've been helping you make the others," he pointed out.

"I just had an inspired idea, Bruce," Tony said, reaching for a piece of scrap paper. With a marker he wrote _10/6_ and then held up the paper for Bruce to see. "You can be the Mad Hatter."

Bruce gave him an incredulous look. "Should I be insulted? Or are _you_ planning on being the March Hare?"

"Dad was the Easter Bunny once," Pietro said before Tony could answer. "Maybe he still has the costume."

"I..." Tony stuttered at the turn of events and made a mental note to add all incriminating photos of that Easter to the blackmail box. "Well, we don't have a Dormouse to round out the ensemble so I guess that idea is out."

Harley snickered, a mischievous gleam in his eyes. "But me and Peter have rats. We could always use our imagination."

Tony gave an exaggerated sigh. "I'm sorry I ever brought it up."

 

* * *

 

Tony knocked on Clint's bedroom door. "Got a minute?"

The teen was lying on his bed, twirling some drumsticks and petting Lucky.

"Not if you're going to give me some sappy speech about me growing up." Clint pushed up from his bed a little to rest on his elbows, Lucky jumping down from the movement and going over to a dog bed in the corner of Clint's room. "But if you must."

Tony snorted. "Thanks for indulging me. Promise I'll make it quick and as non-sappy as possible."

"Eh," Clint shrugged and sat up completely, "don't go changing who you are on my account."

"That's actually a pretty good sequitur," Tony said, pointing at him. Clint gave him a weird look in response. "There's already been tons of changes around here and there are a lot more on the horizon. Bruce and I are probably going to announce the engagement soon," he shared with his son what he and Bruce hadn’t officially decided on yet, just in case, "which means the media is really going to be hammering us. And we'll need to plan the wedding so there's that."

" _Right. '_ Wedding,'" he air-quoted.

"We didn't get hitched in Vegas," Tony said with a roll of his eyes. "And then there's senior year," he continued. "I know how crazy that can be. You saw how it was for Steve. It can be...overwhelming. Thinking about the future, leaving home, going to college."

"Yeah," Clint said flatly, "I guess."

"You're probably going to be under a lot of stress already without adding all of the craziness here at home to the mix. Not to mention you're not the lone senior that you would have been before the others came along. So, Bruce and I, we're probably going to have our hands full with all this; I'm just letting you know now. But, I promise if you ever need to talk to me or need my help because it's just getting to be too much, I'm here. Okay?" He put a hand on Clint's shoulder. "And I'll always be here, even when you go out there and do your own thing without me." 

Clint groaned. "Don't turn this into a Richard Marx song."

Tony's eyebrows flew upward and he smirked. " _Wherever you go, whatever you do_ ," he started serenading.

"No, no," Clint jumped up from his bed and started pushing him out of the room while Tony continued with the song, "no, really no. You can go now. I got it. You'll always be my dad. You believe in me. Great talk. Love you. Good night."

Tony allowed himself to be shoved out of the room and only stopped singing when Clint shut the door in his face. He laughed and shook his head.

He spotted Loki passing by from the corner of his eye. "Hey, Loki, got a sec?"

"If it involves being serenaded, absolutely not," the teen answered as he stopped in his bedroom doorway and turned to look at him. A malevolent smirk slowly crossed his face. "But I’m sure Thor is available," he said and then shut the door.

"And I'm sure Thor will appreciate the wisdom I have to impart," he said loudly, so either Clint or Loki could hear. He then decided to do just that, only to find Thor not in his room. He wouldn't admit it to anyone, but he was genuinely sad to be rebuffed another opportunity. Pietro went racing by him at that moment. "Woah, champ. What's the rush?"

Pietro stopped short and said, "The bathroom in the rec room is out of toilet paper." Tony's eyes widened when he noticed the roll in his hand. "Thor's in there," he explained further.

Tony bit down on a laugh at the older boy's expense. "So that's where he is." He shook his head. "Alright, well go ahead with your mission. But," he added, "you realize there was probably some toilet paper closer, right?"

Pietro just shrugged and hurried on.

Tony couldn't help himself and laughed. He decided to forego any inspiring speech since he was sure Thor wouldn't be in the mood. That and he probably wouldn't be able to keep a straight face around him at the moment. He shook his head and tried to have a little sympathy instead since he'd had his own share of similar moments, seeing as no matter how much toilet paper he bought, somehow they always ran out or else someone was forgetting to restock after using up the last of it.

Moving on down the hall Tony heard sniffling and then the low, soothing timbre of Bruce's voice. He followed the sound to the room Jane and Darcy shared. The door was half closed and Tony lingered outside to assess what was wrong before interfering.

"I know, I know," Bruce was saying and Tony peeked through the ajar space to see him holding both girls on either side as they sat on the foot of Jane's bed, "but think about it this way. Now you're going to have even more experiences to talk about when you get home. It won't be the same, but it can be exciting if you let it be. Like, well, like how it is with Steve now," he said, and Tony heard the waver in his voice. "We don't get to see him as often as before, but when we do there's so much to catch up on."

"I guess that's true," Darcy said.

Tony smiled and decided Bruce had it under control.

He moved on to Harley and Peter's room. He gave a quick knock before entering to find the two boys sitting on their respective beds, throwing a football back and forth and chattering away about something.

"Hey," he cheered, "look at you two following the no tech rule without needing to be reminded. Maybe you're mature enough for sixth grade after all," he teased.

"Hardy-har-har," Harley deadpanned and Peter snickered in response.

"Well, speaking of, either of you boys nervous at all?" Tony pressed on.

Harley caught the football and gave him a skeptical look. "Nervous? Why would we be nervous?"

"I'm just annoyed," Peter chimed in. "Why do we have to go to school at all? Seems kind of pointless once you now how to read and write."

Tony wasn't quite sure he had an answer for that. He was never fond of school very much either, so he could empathize.

"Well," he finally said, "there's also math. And it might seem pointless now, but maybe you'll change your mind later when you're able to get your dream job because you didn't drop out. Which," he added, "dropping out in the sixth grade is not an option so don't get any ideas. You at least have to get to high school before we consider that option, got it?" He meant it playfully, knowing the unlikelihood of them dropping out. "And I don't want any mysterious illnesses in the morning either," he warned, more serious this time, as he moved to leave them. "Sixth grade will be fun. You'll see. Goodnight."

"Goodnight," they said in unison, but without much enthusiasm.

Tony shook his head and glanced at his watch. Jemma was probably waiting in his and Bruce's bedroom for story time already so he gave a quick "good night" to Skye, Natasha and Wanda before making his way there.

"Alright, Jem, I'm—" Tony stopped when he saw Jemma was already fast asleep, curled up cutely in the large bed.

He smiled at the sight and moved closer. She was laying slightly on her copy of _Alice In Wonderland_ so he extracted the book as cautiously as he could. She only stirred to bury her head deeper into the pillows. 

As Tony held the book, he wondered if he should carry her to bed or wait for Bruce. He decided on the latter since she looked too adorable, and comfortable, to move right away.

"Wow. That was fast," Bruce said in a hushed tone when he joined Tony a few short moments later.  

"Actually," Tony said, "she was already asleep when I got here."

"Oh," Bruce toned. "I guess she must still be readjusting to school hours." The kids were already back to going to bed and waking up at the times they did during the school year to help ease the transition. "That or cool dad let them stay up later than he should have while I was away," Bruce suggested archly.

"Okay, I'm offended that you don't see yourself as a cool dad," Tony said in non-answer. "Because your pep talk to Jane and Darcy, very cool."

"You heard?"

He hitched a shoulder. "A little. Let me guess, new school year jitters?"

Bruce nodded. "Jane is having some last minute anxiety over starting high school." He turned and sat down on the edge of the bed. There was a small rueful look in his eyes that told Tony he wasn't entirely pleased with the concept himself. "And Darcy is sad that she won't be able to see Jane at all during the school day anymore."

Tony sat down beside him and looked down at the book still in his hands. A comfortable silence fell between them, leaving Tony's thoughts alone to tumble down a rabbit-hole.

He and Bruce had decided some time ago that there was no need to rush from engagement to marriage, considering it would be another adjustment blending the two large families legally and had decided to keep the announcement to themselves for the time being, not wanting meddling from outside sources to interfere with their bliss. 

Their conversation during a quiet moment earlier in the day had turned toward Pepper's suggestion to consider changing that. They had been leaning toward keeping things just as they were, at least a little longer. 

But in moments like these, Tony wished Clint was right. He wished he and Bruce were already married. If announcing the engagement moved them closer to that, then maybe--

"Maybe," Bruce spoke tentatively, breaking Tony from his thoughts, "maybe we shouldn't jump to any rash decisions."

He turned surprised eyes on the man beside him and didn't even have to ask when he saw the searching look in his fiancé's eyes. It wasn't a yes to the suggestion, but they were on the same page in thinking that maybe it should be.


	2. The Three Musketeers and Mr. Lonely

"Where my seniors at?" yelled a student down the hall, followed by several whoops and cheers. "Seniors in the house!" 

Clint rolled his eyes as he shoved his textbooks into his locker, save for those he needed for his first period English class.

Natasha must have noticed because she leaned on the locker beside him and asked, "What? Not as excited as all the mouth breathers for a year of acting superior and counting down your final days of legalized servitude?"

He looked at her with a raised brow as he shut his locker. She had a small smirk on her face.

"You know," he heaved his backpack over his shoulder, "I'd say being an adult is way more servitude than school, all things considered. School is like a regulated, insular paradise compared to the real world."

She hummed. "Not to mention there's no need to think about college." He frowned and looked down at the floor between them. More sympathetically she asked, "Have you at least looked into it yet? You know, seriously?"

"I—" Clint gave a false start. Sighing, he answered, "I'm just not sure yet."

"Not sure of what you want or what your dad will say?"

"Maybe a little of both, you know?" She tilted her head slightly in the way she did whenever she wasn't sure what something meant, but didn't want to voice it. He turned with a groan to walk toward his first class, Natasha following beside him. "Maybe 'm not really sure what I want to do. I feel like there are a lot of things I'm good at, but nothing I can really see myself making a life out of. Hell, some days I'm not even sure what kind of person I am."

"That's a little dramatic, don't you think?" Natasha retorted.

He stopped and shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe a little," he conceded.

"Then congratulations," she said. "Guess you're officially a senior." He furrowed his brow. "You might not have the celebratory thing down yet, but you've got existential crisis mode nailed."

"That so?" He gave an incredulous snort. "And how would you know, Junior?"

She only rolled her eyes and then looked past him. She smiled and Clint scrunched his face before glancing over his shoulder to see Laura and Bobbi. "Hey, Nat! Hi, Clint!" Laura called, waving as she approached quickly. She looked to him like she was eager to see them again after the few months she'd been away. "I can't wait to hear about your summer," she said, the comment clearly aimed at Natasha and not him. 

"And I would tell you, but it's a bit of a family secret," Natasha answered her, glancing coyly at Clint, before the two of them started down the hall together.

"Did your dads really get married in Vegas?" Clint heard Laura's question before his thoughts were interrupted.

"Hey, Clint." He blinked several times until he realized it was Bobbi. She was looking him over, her expression neutral.

"Hey, Bobbi," he said, voice breaking on the words. Smooth, he chided himself.

"So, I'm throwing a party at my house tomorrow night," she said, one hand on her hip and Clint forced himself not to stare at said hips no matter how much he wanted to. "A _Seniors Only_ bash to kick off the year," she explained. "So I guess that means you're invited too." She smiled thinly.

Clint narrowed his eyes. "Wow, as heartwarming as that invitation is, I'm going to be busy tomorrow night with one of my brothers working on a cake for our sister's birthday."

"Oh." Bobbi's cool demeanor faltered a little and her lips pursed momentarily before spreading into a more genuine smile than before. "That's sweet. Which sister?"

"Uh," Clint was a little stunned by the whiplash, "the youngest. Jemma," he managed.

"Yeah? She's adorable," Bobbi said. "I met her once when I was talking to Dr. Banner."

"Yeah, she's…" Clint's sentence trailed when he processed her entire statement. "You were talking to Dr. Banner?"

"Definitely not about you if that's what you're thinking," she said with a roll of her eyes. "He's a brilliant biochemist. Natasha introduced me to him so I could ask him to look over my submission for a scholarship to Georgia Tech. And maybe get a recommendation too."

"Oh." Clint wasn't sure what else to say, but before he could figure it out the warning bell rang.

"Well," Bobbi looked him over with another neutral expression, "if your other plans fall through, you should come. And extend the invitation to Thor and Loki when you get a chance," she added with a wink before turning on her heels and walking away. Her hips swished with every step and Clint succumbed to the temptation.

He was broken from his trance with a sharp flick to his temple. "Ow, what the—" He looked over to see it was Skye.

"Just trying to stop my brother from being _that_ guy," she explained, walking past him with a wiggle of her fingers. 

"By physically attacking me?" he called after her before shaking his head and hurrying to class.

 

* * *

 

Thor entered his third period civics class and immediately looked around for any familiar faces. So far he hadn't had any classes with Clint or Loki nor any of the friends he'd made the year before. He assumed he would have at least one class with somebody he already knew, but again he was met with faces of those he was only acquainted with.

"Oh well," he mumbled. He could always get to know some of these students better. The more friends the merrier, he decided.

He sat down in an empty desk at the back of the class as he usually did. He didn't do so because he liked to slack off in class, but out of consideration for other students. He tended to be taller than most of them. And larger. He'd learned early on after his first couple of growth spurts that it was just easier to sit in the back.

"Are you sure you're a student here?" an unfamiliar voice asked and Thor turned his head to see a rather tall, svelte girl in the desk beside him. He'd never seen her before.

Picking up on the good-natured humor in her question, and taking no offense, Thor smiled and said, "Actually, I should be in middle school still, but I was skipped up a few grades."

The girl laughed. "I thought that might be the case," she said. Still smiling she continued, "Actually, it's nice to see another giant roaming around this place. I thought the guy in my last class was tall, but you're just plain…" He raised an eyebrow. "Well, _big_."

Thor beamed, knowing she meant it as a compliment. "Thank you. Are you new here?"

"Yeah, the token new kid senior year, that's me." He snorted, thinking fondly of Steve. "I'm Val."

"Nice to meet you, Val. My name is Jake, but friends call me Thor," he introduced himself.

She blinked and slowly smiled. "Thor, huh? It suits you." She then furrowed her brow. "Wait, that tall kid in my last class. I could have sworn somebody called him Loki."

"They probably did," he confirmed. "That tall kid is my brother Loren. But he goes by Loki."

"I guess that makes sense," she said with a nod, the crease between her brow smoothing out. "So are you twins? Because I guess I can see the resemblance now that you mention it," she tilted her head sideways as if looking for said resemblance, "but I wouldn't have guessed it."

"No, not twins. Five months apart."

"Five months! How?" She shook her head. "I mean, you don't have to tell me. That just sounds crazy. But I'm sure it's one of those 'happens more than you think' type things."

"Well, I don't know if it does or not," Thor said honestly. "But in our case, our mother got pregnant almost immediately after having me and then my brother was born several months premature. Our mother died a little after from complications."

"I'm so sorry," she said. "That's terrible. I can't imagine how your brother feels."

Thor furrowed his brow. It wasn't something he'd ever considered. Loki might blame himself for their mother's death or their biological father abandoning them, even if he would never admit it because it wasn't in his nature.

"Thank you," he finally said. "But our lives are far from terrible now. We were adopted at a very young age. Our father has been the best we have a large, supportive family."

"Well, not that it isn't still a little sad," Val said after a moment, "I guess the universe was looking out for you and your brother."

Thor gave a nod as the final bell rang and the teacher stood from his desk and moved to the front of the class. Under his breath, he said, "I was new here last year. If you'd like to get to know some people, feel free to find me at lunch. I can introduce you to my friends and to some of my large family."

"Yeah? I think I'll take you up on that."

"Oh, but as a warning," he said quickly, just in case, "are you familiar with Tony Stark?"

"Of course," she answered with a nod. "Kind of hard not to be these days."

"Right, well, he's my father's fiancé." 

Her eyes widened right as the teacher started speaking to the class.

 

* * *

 

"It's already weird without Sam and Steve here at lunch with us," Skye was commenting as Loki sat down at the table with her and the others. Sometimes he questioned why he graced them with his presence as often as he did.

"Sam maybe," Loki shrugged, "but it's not like we don't see Steve regularly enough."

"He's got a point," Natasha agreed.

"Actually it's weird for me eating lunch with you guys instead of the others," Jane said and Loki noted a hint of melancholy in her voice.

"Such is the unending cycle of seasons and change," Skye declared dramatically before biting into her chicken sandwich.

"Really?" Clint gave her a skeptical look.

"Well, yeah, obviously," Skye said while still chewing her food. "I mean," she swallowed and reached for her carton of milk, "by the end of the year it won't really be weird anymore, but then this time next year it'll be weird all over again when you, Loki and Thor aren't hanging around the school."

"Careful, Skye," Natasha said and Loki glanced at her. She was looking at Clint. "Some of us are a little sensitive to that particular topic."

"What? Graduation?" Skye asked, not catching her meaning.

Loki did, however, and moved his gaze to study Clint. He seemed ruffled by the comment if obviously trying not to let it show. Loki raised an eyebrow when Clint looked at him. Clint returned his questioning look with a neutral expression that said more than Loki thought he might be aware.

"Hello, everyone," Thor interrupted at just that moment and Loki turned his head to see him with the new girl who'd been in a few of his classes. "Meet my friend, Val. She's new here," Thor introduced her as he sat down at the table, Val joining him. "Val," he looked at her, "these are some of my brothers and sisters."

"Wait, so I know Loki here is your brother and you were adopted," she said and Loki's eyebrows rose quickly at that, "but are these all your adopted brothers and sisters?"

"Well," Skye answered, "it's a bit of a technicality at this point. Me and Clint here," she pointed at him, "are brother and sister. But once their dad marries our dad we'll be stepsiblings so, you know." She shrugged and then offered Val a megawatt smile. "I'm Skye, by the way."

"Oh, I get it," Val replied, returning the smile. "You already consider yourself family. That's really sweet."

"Only as long as our dads don't break up before it's permanent," Loki drawled, even if he didn't really think it possible anymore.

"Why would you even say that, you jerk?" Jane chastised.

"Hey, Loki," Skye said and he looked at her, "it's not polite to talk with your mouth full."

"My mouth isn't f _mmph_." Loki was cut off when Skye shoved the bottom half of her sandwich's bun into his mouth. He spat it out and she ducked so that it hit Jane instead.

"Ew! Gross!"

The table broke out into laughter and Loki found he couldn't resist joining in with a few quiet chuckles of his own.

"Having such a big family must be fun," Val commented once everything settled down. "And there's 13 of you total, right?" Val said looking around between them.

"Either you've deduced who we are from the tabloids or else Thor told you," Loki replied, "but yes."

"Thor told me," she admitted, "but I think I probably would have figured it out. But here I thought that kind of stuff only happened on TLC, but you guys actually seem normal."

"Oh, we're anything but," Loki retorted.

"He's right," Natasha chimed in. "We might not be religious nuts, but our dads are probably a little insane."

"But it's a good insanity," Skye added right on cue, always ready to defend their large, unconventional blended family.

"So long as nobody gets any ideas to follow us around with cameras," Natasha said. "Hey," she then greeted Laura as the girl joined them as she often did now.

"Is this another sibling?" Val asked, probably only half teasing even if she said it with a smirk as she looked at Thor.

"No, that's just Natasha's girlfriend, Laura," Loki jeered at his sister before anyone else could answer.

"Oh?" Val seemed to perk up at that and Loki tilted his head. "You like girls too? Natasha was it?"

Natasha glanced at the girl beside her discreetly, the latter looking deliciously uncomfortable Loki noted, and then glared at him before turning her attention back to Val.

"Actually, I'm asexual," she answered. "So it's not really a matter of liking girls specifically." She shrugged.

"Hey, that's cool. I get it. I'm bi so I know a thing or two about it being confusing," Val offered with a snort.

"Also, we're not dating," Laura chimed in. "Loki just likes to tease us."

"Yeah, his sexuality is being an asshole," Clint remarked, smirking at him.

"You jest, but how do you know it isn't?" Loki retorted, lifting one eyebrow. The other boy raised his hands as if to say he didn't feel like having this particular battle of wits.

"I'm Jane," Jane said, changing the subject. "I'm a freshman so I'm kind of new here too."

"Nice to meet you, Jane," Val said with a smile. "At least you have a nice support system to help you out. I would have killed for that as a freshman."

"Well, the only one who's helped me today is Skye," Jane said and Loki rolled his eyes. As if she really needed all that much help.

"Hey, I was a freshman last year so it was no big deal," Skye said, altruistic as always, and Loki rolled his eyes again.

"I would have," Thor spoke up, "but all of the senior classes are on the other side of the building."

"Same," Clint offered. "But we have accounting together later so I'll swing by the freshman hallway and get you, how's that sound?"

Loki felt like rolling his eyes a third time, but that would be too much even for him.

"Wait, you're a senior too?" Val deduced from Clint's statement. "How many of you are seniors?"

"Just the three of us," Thor answered. He beamed and knowing what was coming Loki groaned. "We're like the three musketeers."

Loki changed his mind and decided he could, indeed, roll his eyes a third time. He did so as he stood to his feet.

"Yeah, Principal Fury hates us because we're thirty percent of the graduating class just between us," Clint joked.

Loki couldn't resist a parting barb and said, "Well, he shouldn't worry. With those math skills, you'll no doubt fail accounting and not get to graduate." He could feel Clint's glare as he walked away.

 

* * *

 

Clint listened as Jane chattered about the first day of school to his dad who had come to pick them up. He had asked all of them, but outside of a few generic responses from the others, Jane was the one dominating the conversation with her experiences thus far as a high school student.

"Let's see if you're this enthusiastic by the end of the first grading period," Natasha commented at a break in the conversation.

"Why wouldn't I be?" Jane countered. "I love school."

"And that's great," Tony said as they pulled into the line of other cars at the K-8 Academy to pick up kids. "I don't expect everyone to share Jane's eagerness, but I don't want anyone trying to dissuade her or make her feel bad. Different strokes." He paused. "Although," he continued, "I'm wondering why you didn't answer at all, Clint. No status report makes me a little worried it means you skipped out or something." His tone was teasing, but Clint knew his joke was just a roundabout way of asking him directly for his input.

"Eh," he responded, "I'm a seasoned veteran at first days. Nothing really to report that I haven't reported before."

His dad snorted. "Fair enough."

Suddenly one of the doors of the vehicle opened even though they hadn't reached the loading zone. Pietro stuck his head in. "Hey, Clint, Principal Coulson wants to know if he could have a quick word with you."

Clint's eyes widened. He avoided eye contact with the siblings in the car who were probably already heckling him silently. He swallowed and said, "Uh, yeah, I guess. No idea what he could want though," he added with a hitch of his shoulder before shuffling out of the vehicle and following Pietro back to the front of the building where the Principal stood overseeing student pick-up.

"Thank you, Pietro," Coulson said as they approached. "You can go back to what you were doing until you and your siblings are called for pick-up." Clint's brother nodded and ran off. "You're probably wondering why your old principal wants to talk to you," he then said, turning toward him with a smile.

"A little," Clint answered. "Please don't tell me you just learned I never really graduated middle school and I have to be sent back," he joked.

Coulson chuckled softly and Clint simultaneously hated and loved the sound. Pull it together, he shouted at himself in his head. Coulson was only a few years shy of twice his age. A relationship with him wasn't only impossible, it would be highly questionable – not to mention currently _illegal_ , his brain supplied. And even if none of that were true, he knew that at least at one time there had been a woman in Coulson's life, even if he wasn't sure if there was a new one in his life after the woman's photo had vanished from the principal's desk.

"…and it's something I would like to continue."

Clint blinked, realizing he hadn't been listening. He tried to pick up context clues from what he was saying now to try and piece together the subject.

Coulson paused and said several names into his walkie talkie, students whose rides had reached the loading zone.

"So, now you're part of the second graduating class I've had the pleasure of guiding from one school to the next," he continued.

Clint considered his statement before realizing he must be referring to the fact that Clint had been in 7thgrade when he had become principal of the K-8 Academy. That made Clint think maybe the conversation was of a sentimental value, which would make sense given the principal's nature.

"And when I was going through some of the things I've held onto from that school year," Coulson was still explaining as Clint tried to analyze every word and pay attention at the same time, "naturally I came across a few things of yours to add to my Graduates Board."

"Oh yeah," Clint said, understanding at last. He'd seen the board the year before, featuring photos, awards, and more of those seniors that had also attended the K-8 Academy. It was meant to inspire his current students.

Coulson paused and looked at him with a raised eyebrow. "Yeah," he finally said, apparently deciding to interpret his outburst as excitement or some other odd thing. Clint tried not to cringe at how that made him look. "But one thing I found for your graduating class was a project that you all did on careers you were interested in."

Clint blinked. "Huh. I don't remember that. What did I pick?"

Coulson chuckled again. "I understand it's been a couple of years. You chose Secret Service."

"Right," Clint said, the memory suddenly coming back to him.

His interest in law enforcement had started with a phase of wanting to be someone who protected high profile people. He swallowed hard at the reason why he'd been interested in such a job in the first place.

"Right," he said again, voice shakier than before. "I remember now. I think I wrote something cheeky about everyone wanting to be president but I'd rather be one of the cool dudes in black protecting him."

"You did," Coulson confirmed, smiling. "Which brings me to the point I had in mind. I realize that interests and dreams can change a lot between eighth grade and college, but I wanted to let you know about an opportunity you might want to consider if that career is still on your radar."

Clint wasn't sure if he was still interested, since he hadn't even thought of it in years, but at the same time it couldn't hurt to hear the principal out. Not if he was going out of his way to help him, which Clint was stupidly happy about.

"What kind of opportunity?" He kept his tone neutral. 

"It's possible you're already aware of this, but the Secret Service have an internship for anyone who's at least 16. It's not paid, but it gives you an opportunity to get a feel for the career from the inside. Even if you decide that it's not for you, I know for a fact that it's a wonderful experience."

"Really?" Clint had to admit it sounded intriguing. "I guess most places have internships, but never thought something like the Secret Service would." He furrowed his brow after a few seconds consideration. "But wouldn't I have to live in D.C.?"

"No," Coulson answered. "They have field offices located all across the country."

"I never knew that," he admitted. "What grade did I get on that paper anyway?" he then asked as a joke.

Coulson laughed again. Clint still hated it. He also hated that he was born fifteen years too late.

 

* * *

 

Steve tossed his backpack on the floor and flopped down on his dorm bed. His roommate would still be in classes for about another hour, giving him an hour to himself. Not that he wasn't often by himself anyways. Almost immediately his thoughts began to take advantage of the silence to bombard him with questions and doubts.

When he had enrolled at Empire State University, he'd had a long list of pros versus cons that helped him make the choice. Still undecided on whether to follow his interest in the arts or to follow his boyfriend and best friend into the military, he had figured he could start by getting his general education out of the way. Empire State University had offered him a generous scholarship based on his being the son of an alumni which had swayed him just as much as the school's nearness to home. Even then, he had opted for staying on campus instead of paying a commuter fee, if only to get used to being on his own for when he eventually transferred elsewhere. But Steve hadn't even been there a full month and already he wondered if he had made a mistake.

He'd always had an independent streak and it wasn't that he couldn't take care of himself, but sometimes the rowdiness of campus life wasn't quite the same as the rowdiness of a dozen younger brothers and sisters. It was hardly as rowdy as when he'd had only half a dozen younger brothers and sisters. Sometimes when he visited home, he didn't really want to leave. If he were being honest, it was less about the noise and more about the loneliness he felt when he left the noise of his family and returned to the noise of ESU.

Steve had yet to really make any friends or join any clubs. He'd considered checking out the sports, but track was still his thing and that wouldn't be available until the spring. He'd only ever played football on account of Sam and hadn't played long enough to end up on any scout radars so that hadn't been an option either. He'd also considered checking out the art scene, but hadn't worked up the nerve yet. For all of his love for creating things, he had never really considered himself an artist nor made friends with other artists. Honestly, Loki had been more at ease with that crowd than himself.

Outside of occasional conversation with his roommate or a professor or a classmate, none of which were ever really substantial, Steve kept to himself in a quiet routine that felt kind of empty and a little pointless. If not for his self-discipline he wasn't even sure if he'd care about doing any of his assignments.

Steve sighed and pushed himself up off of his bed. He decided the only way to stop feeling sorry for himself was to do one of said assignments. Then maybe he would work on the rest of the decorations for Jemma's birthday party. Or maybe he would sketch out a design for her cake. He didn't really want to do any of those things. He'd rather call Sam, but his boyfriend was traveling with his dad ahead of his basic training and he didn't want to interrupt their time together more than necessary. He stuck with texts and snapchats until Sam made the time to call him.

"And you'll have to get used to it," he thought aloud, shaking his head.

He knew once Sam got to basic training, there would be no telling when they would get to talk to each other again, or see each other for that matter. Steve paused in reaching for his backpack. Suddenly he felt even lonelier than before and he wasn't sure school work would help.

He glanced at his watch. Maybe he would call one of his siblings instead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. To my knowledge the smallest gap between siblings, with the younger surviving, is roughly 6 months. So that makes Thor and Loki one month shy of that record. For those who might be wondering how realistic it is.  
> 2\. Mr. Lonely is a song by Bobby Vinton (though some may know of it through its use in a song by Akon about ten or so years back).  
> 3\. Happy Thanksgiving to any US readers who celebrate the holiday.


	3. Expo, Exposed

 

 

> _Dear Jake,_
> 
> _Sorry I hurt your feelings. I was being mean becuse you made me mad when you took Mister Bear to stuff animol day when I said no. I probaly should of shared. Mister Bear is speshal and I was scared you ~~mite~~  might lose him. I guess I was wrong because you didn't. _
> 
> _Sorry speshally that I said I don't want you to be my brother nemore. I lied. I would be sad if that was true. Please forgive me._
> 
> _Love,_
> 
> _(Still I hope) Your Brother Steve_
> 
> _PS, Mister Bear told me he had fun_

 

"Oh god, they're worse than I remember," Tony said from across the room.

Bruce blinked away a few tears as he looked up from the old letter written in crayon. His fond smile was joined with a furrowed brow when he saw Tony looking at a photo album and shaking his head.

They were currently in one of the basements, working in tandem on their plan to reinstate the blackmail box. Tony was working on looking for things from his and his kids' past to add while Bruce worked on removing anything solely relating to Steve. In general the task seemed to be taking longer than it should since more time was spent reminiscing than not.

Bruce carefully set his most recent find aside to cross the room and see what Tony was referring to. The other man noticed him coming and looked momentarily uncertain of whether or not he wanted Bruce to see.

"Brace yourself, Bruce," Tony said, tone resolute as if he'd made his decision to be brave about it, "it isn't pretty." He handed the album over to him.

Bruce looked at the pictures in question. On the one hand, his heart melted. On the other hand, he understood how Tony might feel self-conscious of being in a large rabbit costume while surrounded by his late wife and children in their Easter best. The longer he looked at the group photo, the more he was inclined to chuckle a little at Tony's expense.

Instead, he cleared his throat and said, "Well, some of them are pretty. Maya and the kids at least," he added, a snicker escaping.

"You're never going to see me the same way are you?" Tony asked melodramatically.

"Don't be so dramatic." Bruce rolled his eyes as he said it. "I already see you as a great dad. And that's what I see here. So your reputation is fine. I mean, this is sweet. I'm just…" He narrowed his eyes and tilted his head. "I'm just curious if everyone else was in their Sunday best for a reason?"

Bruce looked up, lifting an eyebrow as he did. Tony wasn't someone he would call religious, but that didn't mean he hadn't been at one time. Or maybe Dr. Hansen had been.

"Uh, yeah," Tony fidgeted, "that's what makes it worse. I might have forgotten that Maya had organized an Easter social for some of our neighbors and employees. And she'd hired a photographer for Easter photos."

Bruce's eyes widened. "How do you forget something like that?" Not that he couldn't easily imagine Tony completely spacing something he wasn't interested in, but this seemed a little different.

A smile, bittersweet in appearance, touched Tony's face. "Maya asked the same thing." He shook his head in a fond manner. "Pepper too, actually," he added with a soft chuckle. "But I guess you can say back then I wasn't always the most reliable when it came to stuff like that. It's crazy that Maya put up with me when sometimes I was barely…barely able to do this whole domestic thing." He cleared his throat and glanced down at his feet.

Bruce looked back down at the pictures. He had no doubt whatsoever as to why Maya had put up with Tony. In spite of how that day might have gone or any frustration she might have had with him, her smile said all that Bruce needed to know. Maya had loved her life.

Bruce swallowed down the mixed feelings of pity, guilt, and jealousy that sometimes settled as a lump in his throat when he was invited into the part of Tony's life that had been graced by Dr. Hansen.

Gently he said, "It's your decision, of course, but these aren't anything to be ashamed of. He glanced up to see Tony looking at him again. "You all look like you couldn't be any happier, no matter how silly the situation."

Tony smiled and gave a small nod. "You're right. I wouldn't go back and change how that day turned out. I wouldn't trade the memory for a normal family photo."

"I don't think I would either if it had been me," Bruce agreed and handed the photo album back, leaning in to peck Tony on the lips as he did. "Now, I'd better get back to what I was doing. I keep getting distracted."

"I know what you mean," Tony said in solidarity.

As Bruce made his way back across the room, something caught his eye. Something always was considering how much stuff Tony had tucked away. A closer look at the item in question showed him what looked like a scale model display.

"Is that Flushing Meadows?" he asked in spite of his need to get back to his previous task.

"Huh?" Tony queried. Then he understood and answered, "Oh, uh, yeah. It is. It's a model of the old Stark Expo my dad used to host at the park."

"Ah," Bruce replied with a nod. "That makes sense. I remember reading about the Expos when I was a kid. A lot of groundbreaking ideas were introduced there."

"There were," Tony said. He walked over to the model and pulled it out from where it was wedged between a few boxes so that Bruce could see it better. "Probably my old man's best legacy as far as the company goes. Then again, I guess it's not a legacy if it ended with him is it?" he added in a thoughtful tone and shrugged.

"I'd say his best legacy is you," Bruce countered.

"Well, that's probably not a shared belief," Tony said, shaking his head, "but thanks. I'm sure there are plenty of people still clinging to what Stark Industries used to be. To the weapons and the Expo and dad's less than subtle pro-imperial way of doing things."

"Then those people are living in the past," Bruce offered and moved closer to look at the model along with Tony. "Which, ironically, is entirely opposed to what the Expo stood for. Regardless of anything else your father was, he seemed to have at least some visions for the future and wanted to cultivate innovation."

He glanced up and found Tony's eyes were distant, calculating. Bruce knew he was thinking about something. It was the look he got when he was struck by some new idea, either brilliant or crazy and sometimes both. Tony slowly looked back down at the model, tilting his head.

"You're right," he finally said, tone uncertain as he still studied the object that had prompted their conversation. "The Expo was proof of that and Stane…" He glanced up again, the previous look fading into something darker. "Stane hated the Expo," he said. "Thought it was a waste of time and a waste of resources. He convinced me that it didn't make sense in the modern world to have that sort of thing. Not when all the talent we needed could be recruited from graduates. Not when other companies no longer wanted to play nice."

Bruce listened with a frown. When Tony finished, he hazarded a reply of, "So he didn't like the reminder of what your father wanted the company to be, even if your father hadn't been able to make it that. He must have realized you could do it and wanted to prevent it from happening."

Tony swallowed hard. "And when he couldn't… When I followed my conscience later..." He closed his eyes, a broken expression on his face.

"I'm sorry, Tony," Bruce said in a low voice. "I'm sorry he took her away from you."

At the moment his feelings were pure sympathy, neither guilt nor jealousy. He could tell that Tony was somewhere in the past, seeing things that Bruce didn't have to try hard very hard to imagine for himself. He needed someone to give him condolences for whatever pain he was reliving in his mind's eye. He didn't need Bruce to feel sorry for himself, he only needed him to comfort him until he came back.

After a moment, Tony's eyes opened again and Bruce saw when the light of the present returned.

"I'm sorry I didn't stand up to him sooner," Tony said ruefully. "Maybe he would have tried to kill me sooner and succeeded, so that's the only thing that makes me grateful for my apathy back then." Bruce tried not to shiver at the thought, but the selfish part of him couldn't help it. "Without it, I wouldn't have my kids." 

"I know how that is," Bruce replied gently. 

After a quiet moment, Tony looked back down at the model. "But that doesn't mean I can't undo some of his contempt for my father's company," he said, voice steely with conviction. "I'm going to bring back the Stark Expo," he declared. "JARVIS, get me a render of Flushing Meadows and send Pepper an email about scheduling a staff meeting for tomorrow."

_Yes, sir_ ,  JARVIS replied.

When Tony looked up and met Bruce's eyes again there was a passionate light that was contagious and made Bruce's heart beat faster in excitement for the project. Bruce felt like he was back at that first conference, in complete awe of the other man and wanting nothing more than to work with him. He had absolutely no doubts that Tony would do just as he said, no matter how spontaneous the plan, and Bruce couldn't wait to be a part of it now that he had that privilege.

 

* * *

 

Skye was scrolling through her social media feed on her phone when Steve's picture filled the screen, alerting her to an incoming call from her older almost-brother. She answered the call with a cheerful, "Hey, Steve, what's up?" She switched to holographic mode and then grabbed her nearby tablet to continue scrolling through her feed from where she'd left off on the other device.

"Hey, Skye. Not much," he answered her question. She paused her scrolling and furrowed her brow. She glanced at the screen. His expression was cheerful enough, but something in his tone seemed off. "I have some time to kill and don't feel like doing homework, so I thought I'd call and ask how everyone's first day went."

She wasn't sure she actually believed him, especially since he could have just texted, but she couldn't think of any other reason for him to call so maybe he was just going the extra distance. It was Steve so it wasn't entirely out of character. Or maybe he was nostalgic for the previous school year like Skye had been at lunch and he just didn't want to admit it.

"It was weird without you," she said to the point, just in case it was her latter suspicion and he needed reassurance that he wasn't alone. "But other than that, totally boring as usual. There's a new girl though. Her name's Val and Thor's already made friends with her so she might be hanging around more. She's cool."

"Yeah? When you say friend, do you mean friend or _friend_?" Steve queried, sounding more like himself than before.

Skye smiled and continued scrolling through her feed as she answered, "Well, it's Thor. He's practically the same with everyone so it's hard for me to tell sometimes. But I didn't get a majorly interested vibe from her side."

Steve chuckled. "Well, keep me posted. I want to tease him about it if I can."

Skye's smile widened. "You got it. It's about time Thor gets his fair share of it."

Steve matched her conspiratorial tone, "Right? Not to sound like Loki, but even I get a little annoyed with how perfect Thor is. But knowing our luck, he'll just tease himself and everyone will go with it because who can resist that?"

Skye snorted. "You're right. That definitely sounds like—" She stopped abruptly when she clicked on a post a friend had just shared with her. "Oh come on! Why can't they just leave our dads alone!? It's absolutely— Okay, ew, ew, back, back, back." She pressed the back button as quickly as she could.

"Uh, did I miss something?"

"Huh?" Skye blinked, closed her eyes tight, and then blinked again. She glanced at the screen of her phone to see Steve studying her. "Whatever you do, do not check TMZ today."

"Well, I wasn't planning on it," he replied with a lifted eyebrow, "but now I'm curious."

"Okay, well, if you want to see a naked backside that they're claiming is my dad's, go for it, but don't say I didn't warn you," she replied, shivering again. She didn't believe it was her dad for a second, but that didn't make it any less disturbing.

"No longer curious," Steve said, grimacing. "Except for why they would post something like that in the first place," he added.

"Probably just the usual. More crap speculation about our dads' relationship. A few days ago they were secretly married. I guess now they're back to my dad cheating on your dad. Only this time they want people to believe they have more explicit evidence."

Steve shook his head. "Pretty sure this is why they don't want us looking at that stuff in the first place. Why do you?"

"I can't help it," she groaned, "you know? My friends send me links and I click. Maybe it's morbid curiosity. I mean, it's usually hilarious. This is hilarious too when you try to imagine my dad actually finding time to cheat on your dad. Other than the scarring image of whoever's naked backside that is."

"Sure," Steve hitched a shoulder, "I guess. But it wasn't funny when it was with Cousin Jen," he reminded her.

Skye frowned, remembering how she'd been genuinely worried. "Yeah, well," she tried to justify the difference in her reaction now compared to then, "that was before our dads were engaged. We know now for certain there's no chance of that happening. And dad's face was pretty clear in those photos so it's not like he could deny it," she pointed out. "Unlike a blurry back that could belong to anyone."

"True," Steve conceded. "They probably even made sure to go with a faceless picture just to make it seem more plausible after what Tony said about giving him more credit."

Skye furrowed her brow until the interview he was referring to came back to her. The memory only served to make her frown harder. "That's a good point. People will probably believe this one since they don't know the truth like we do."

"Probably," Steve nodded, "but I'm sure our dads can handle it. They're probably handling it already. We should stay out of it this time."

"You're right. Or," she considered, quirking her lips, "you could always give the papz stalking our family something more interesting to talk about."

Steve's eyes widened. "What's that supposed to mean?"

She rolled her own eyes in answer. "You're at college. I'm sure you've got at least one dedicated pap hoping for you to do something interesting."

Steve blinked several times. Then he scowled. "Great. Now I'm going to be looking over my shoulder every time I step out of my dorm room. Thanks for that."

"Don't bother. They'll probably get bored following you around after a few more weeks. If they haven't gotten bored already. I doubt even they can spin a scandal out of you doing something like attending a nude art study."

"If I wanted insinuations that I'm some wet blanket, I would have called Natasha," Steve retorted.

"You're the one assuming that's what I'm insinuating," Skye said with a shrug. "Being boring isn't bad. It's just not the kind of thing that's interesting to tabloids."

"I don't want to be interesting tabloids," Steve reasoned.

"Not even if it got them off our dads' backs for a little bit?" she returned to the original suggestion, even if she was mostly joking.

"I don't see how it would," Steve answered. "Pretty sure they'd find a way to spin it so that it's a reaction to their relationship or proof of them being bad parents."

Skye winced. "Good point."

_All present members of the family have been asked to assemble as soon as possible_ , JARVIS suddenly announced.

Skye's eyes widened, suspicious of the reason.

"I won't lie," Steve said, "I kind of miss that."

"Yeah, well," she replied, "pretty sure this isn’t going to be a fun family meeting." He gave her a questioning look. "Unless it's about the TMZ thing, I have a feeling it's about—"

"It's the blackmail box," Darcy ducked her head into the room to say, a little out of breath. "Harley and Peter spied them in the basement going through stuff." She then rushed out again, and Skye could hear similar chatter in the hall outside of her room.

"The blackmail box?" Steve queried. "I thought dad nixed that when we moved in."

Skye looked back at her phone. "Yeah, well, apparently our dads have decided that it's something they want to reinstate for all of us now. They told Natasha yesterday and we've been waiting for the inevitable shoe to drop. Guess this is it."

Steve blinked, a picture of incredulity. "Seriously? Isn't enough having JARVIS report everything we do? Kinda hard to blackmail a sibling when you have an AI babysitter that can put a stop to it."

"Right?" Skye agreed with a snort. "But don't let Wanda hear you call him that. She'd be insulted on his behalf."

Steve chuckled. "Maybe we should suggest putting all evidence of her weird fixation in the box."

"That would only be helpful if she were ashamed of it," Skye pointed out.  

_Skye, as you are one of the last to assemble, I would advise ending the current conversation about your sister and heading to the assembly couch_ , JARVIS interjected.

Skye's eyebrows shot up and Steve mirrored the look. He seemed as torn between amusement and concern as she was.

"Alright, J," she said, failing to hold back the laughter in her tone, "chill. I'm going. See you tomorrow, Steve."

He nodded and offered her a parting condolence on the blackmail box.  

 

* * *

 

Natasha listened quietly as Skye and Clint brainstormed with Loki and Jane ways to get the blackmail box un-reinstated at the lunch table. It had been less than twenty-four hours and already nobody appreciated the unique parenting tool. The Stark kids hated having to adjust to it and the Banner kids were mortified that they had to deal with it again after their dad having gone lax on the policy.

The night before their fathers had made a showy display of merging all the previous items from the Banner family with newly selected items from the Stark family into one new box. Tony had pulled each of his kids aside one by one to show them the items he'd selected beforehand so they would know exactly what was going in the box, and then told them if they had anything else they wanted him to add they could bring more items to him or Bruce. Then they had gone over the point of the box, what it meant now that they were all involved, how it would continue from now on as a means of making sure nobody blackmailed or bullied each other, blah, blah, and blah.

"Hm-mm," Natasha finally interjected, shaking her head. The others stopped talking and looked at her. "None of that's going to work."

"And why's that?" Clint asked, seeming a little affronted. She figured that made sense considering several of the ideas thrown about had been his own.

She shrugged and took a bite of her macaroni and cheese. When she swallowed she answered, "Because so far you're all operating on the pretense that our dads can be reasoned with. In their minds, they've already addressed any concerns about the box and figured out a method of fairness moving forward."

"But it's not fair," Jane argued. "Just because we're becoming a blended family doesn't mean we should have to share _everything._ Our pasts should be separate things for us to share if we choose to share. Not because they were already in a box and more people came along with a sudden right to any of that stuff if our dads decide we wronged them somehow."

"It's not like we exactly like the idea of random embarrassing stuff from our past being potentially used against us," Clint pointed out. "Kind of unfair for us to have to do something just to make it fair for your old box to still be a thing."

"If you think about it," Thor finally weighed in on the topic as well, his tone considering, "it's like the only blackmail here is our fathers blackmailing us with this box."

Natasha blinked a couple of times and shared a look with Loki. He voiced their response to Thor's epiphany for the both of them: "Are you seriously only just figuring this out? Even when it was just us, that has always been the irony. Sure, father might think his own things being included takes the edge off—"

"And I guess it does a little," Natasha offered with a hitch of her shoulder before taking another bite of food.

"A little," Loki granted, "but as long as he still holds the key and insists on using the box as a method of preventing us from behaving unjustly toward one another, the concept is still dubious because he's blackmailing us into not blackmailing each other. You're telling me that hasn't always been obvious?"

Thor shrugged. "Maybe it has, but I've never really thought much about it. I just went with it and understood it's one of those weird things parents do that you have no control over."

"Do you even have anything in the box you're embarrassed by?" Skye asked, shaking her head in disbelief.

"Nothing immediately comes to mind," he answered.

"Maybe that's an angle," Jane suggested. "What if we just pretend like we're not embarrassed by any of the things in the box and just willingly share the things in there with each other?"

"Like reverse psychology?" Clint raised an eyebrow and she nodded.

"That might work," Natasha considered it, "but it would defeat the purpose of complaining about it in the first place. The only upside is that we have a little more agency in how we share the memories."

"That we might not have shared if our hands hadn't been forced," Loki muttered.

She weighed her head from side to side in partial agreement.

"So what do you think we should do, Natasha?" Skye asked. "Do you have anything better?"

"Better probably isn't the word for it," she hedged. "Because the only other way I can see for convincing our dads to get rid of the box is if we make them think it's causing more harm than good."

Clint's eyes widened, proof he understood. Loki's proof was in the pleased smile that spread across his face at the thought of mischief. Skye and Jane shared uncertain glances, perhaps still working it out or having both worked it out and not liking the idea, Natasha wasn't entirely sure. Thor just went back to eating.

 

* * *

 

There was a knock on Pepper's office door. She glanced up from a contract she was reading over and saw the Public Relations Director standing in the doorway.  

"Mr. Pithins, come in," she said with a smile. She also glanced at the clock to see how much time there was left before the impromptu meeting Tony had insisted on having that morning with her as well as all team leaders and department heads.

He must have seen the motion because he said, "About five minutes. I was on my way there now, but wanted to speak with you really quick beforehand."

She set aside the contract for later. "Of course," she said. "Anything…" 

She paused when her inbox pinged with a new message. A quick glance at who it was from proved a tempting distraction. She forced her eyes away and then stood up and came around to lean against the front of her desk as further removal from the temptation.

Pepper cleared her throat and started over, asking, "Anything concerning? More elopement reports?" she added with a chuckle.

Mr. Pithins only smiled grimly and replied, "I wish. Something a little more daunting than that."

"I don't like the sound of that," she said, her own amusement turning to trepidation. "What are you up against now? Please tell me it's nothing with the kids." She held her breath.

"No, thankfully not that," he answered. "You know we've been keeping a special eye out for anything on that front now with the oldest off to college, but it's been quiet where the kids are concerned." Pepper let out her breath and waited for him to continue. "We're back to allegations against Mr. Stark's fidelity."

Pepper furrowed her brow. "Why would they try that again so soon? Tony already addressed it. Who is he rumored to be cheating with this time? We can run the pictures by him to clear up the confusion and get a cease and desist."

"That's just it," Mr. Pithins said. "The photos are grainy and Mr. Stark isn't particularly identifiable." She rolled her eyes in understanding. "But the source has passed along a few early photos to TMZ to tease the exclusive and are planning a full spread based on their assertion that the naked man in the photos is none other than Mr. Stark."

"Naked?" Pepper blurted. "They're claiming to have explicit photos of Ton—" She quickly corrected herself, "I mean, Mr. Stark?"

"The man in the photos is never seen from the front, but I can tell you certainly the photos aren't doctored in any way."

"So it's not him. It's somebody else."

He shrugged. "It wouldn't be the first time a source took a chance on libel. I've got Mr. Alvarez on the case, but I thought you should know just in case."

"He's not cheating on Dr. Banner," Pepper said, keeping her voice stern and even in light of his implication.

"I'm not saying he is," he replied, "but as much as we want to believe the best, we always have to be prepared for the worst."

Pepper grinded her teeth together before forcing it into a professional smile. "I thank you for the advice, Mr. Pithins. Keep me updated on the situation. As extreme as this particular claim might be, unless either Mr. Stark or Dr. Banner bring it to our attention, we'll keep this between us until Mr. Alvarez finishes his business per usual."

Mr. Pithins nodded, understanding her meaning that the conversation was over indefinitely. She nodded in return and then grabbed a few items from her desk before following him out of her office and toward the meeting room.

Upon arriving she made her way across the large space to her usual seat next to Tony and found him and Bruce already there, chatting happily with smiles on their faces and some equal, unspoken delight dancing in their eyes. Not only did it make Pepper wonder just what Tony had up his sleeve for the unscheduled meeting, it made her all the more determined to dismiss any and all suspicion aimed at her best friend's loyalty to the man beside him.

"Hey, Pepper," Bruce was the first one to notice her and break the conversation to greet her.

He took a seat in the chair on Tony's other side. Pepper's eyes widened. She glanced down the table at the other team leaders as they shuffled in. Usually Bruce took his place among them during these kinds of meetings. She glanced back at him and then at Tony.

Tony's eyes practically sparkled as he said, "Excellent observation. That's why you're my COO."

"Am I being demoted and replaced?" she asked with a teasing laugh, looking at Bruce again.

The man ducked his head and shook it. "No, definitely not."

"But," Tony interjected, "he will be my equal partner on the event I'm about to announce." He wore a wide, pleased smile as he said it. Bruce merely remained sheepish and Pepper wondered at what that announcement might be.

"An event?" She blinked. " _That_ event?" she guessed. "Are you announcing it?"

"Nope. Not that. A one hundred percent _bona fide_ Stark Industries event on which Bruce here has agreed to share with me all duties and responsibilities in seeing it come to fruition."

"Either tell her," Bruce intervened, albeit amusedly as he did, "or else stop taunting her with vague details and get the meeting started."

Tony smiled even wider than before and clapped his hands. "Alright, everyone settle in. Thank you for coming. Lights." The lights dimmed on his command. "Beginning next week, we will have approximately nine months to prepare for the biggest event of 2017."

Suddenly the entire conference table became a holographic display of Flushing Meadows reimagined as the stage for Tony's vision. There were some gasps, Pepper among them.

"Ladies, Gentlemen, and All Other Identities," Tony declared, "the return of the Stark Expo."

 

* * *

 

Clint returned from the kitchen with a couple of drinks, one for him and one for Steve who was unloading his art supplies onto the dining table.

"You need all of that?" he asked with a chuckle as he sat down in a seat adjacent to him at one end of the table.

Steve chuckled in response. "Probably not, but I didn't want to take any chances. I might need them for something else before the weekend is over."

"Fair enough," Clint replied. When Steve finally pulled out his sketchpad and opened it, Clint's eyes widened. He looked between the elaborate sketch in front of him and its artist incredulously. "You're kidding me, right?"

"Just an idea," Steve said with a shrug, but he sounded to Clint like he might be a little offended.

"Yeah and it's an amazing idea," Clint assured him just in case. "But that's just it. It's too amazing. I don't think I could ever pull it off. Way too many details going on. Unless you feel comfortable rendering all the artistic stuff solo?"

"Ah…" Steve glanced down at his design for Jemma's cake. He swallowed hard. "No, guess not. Not on short notice without any practice anyway," he said, pulling the sketchpad back to himself.  

"Yeah, and if our cake turns out bad photographic evidence of the failure will probably end up in that damn blackmail box you guys just _had_ to bring with you."

Steve winced and followed it with a nervous chuckle. "Yeah, sorry about that. But on the bright side, you won't have to deal with it for

as long as I did."

"What do you mean?" Clint asked as he watched Steve grab his art pencils and flip to an unused page of his sketchpad.

"Oh, well, I guess when our dads talked about reimplementing it, they decided that once any of us graduate, any of our personal stuff from over the years will be removed from the box."

"Really?"

"Guess so. My dad already pulled out all of my stuff and put them in its own separate memory box with my name on it. He said he wants to hold onto it for now. You know, for sentimental reasons." Clint nodded, understanding. "But essentially it's mine to do whatever I want with and can't be used against me anymore."

"That's…" Clint searched for the right word and lamely finished with, "kind of deep."

"Well, the box has always been unorthodox, I guess. But dad said it was Tony who came up with the idea. Like, some sort of metaphor for how we're adults and our parents trust us to have learned from the embarrassing moments and failures and have a clean slate to make new ones? I don't know. It was kind of a weird conversation, honestly," Steve said with a chuckle.

Clint snorted. "I'll bet. They didn't mention it to any of us, so I guess they've got it saved as some special moment when each of us get our own box of memories. _Great_." He shook his head. "But, yeah, guess I'm not surprised my dad threw that idea in," he then added, considering it.

"So, just think," Steve said, "you'll only have your memories in the group box until graduation so unless you screw up so badly that our dads see no other choice but to use it against you, I'm sure you'll be fine."

"Right, yeah, of course," Clint said and hurried to change the subject. "So getting back to the cake, how about we figure out something a little simpler that we can work into a classic three-layer design," he suggested. "It can be asymmetrical and shaped, but nothing super crazy, like teapots raining playing cards because, _dude_." What had Steve been thinking?

Steve laughed. "Okay, I can do that." He quickly sketched out a generic three-layered cake. "I think it would still be cool to integrate the Cheshire Cat somehow," he said, tapping at the paper a few times as he studied it.

Clint nodded in agreement. "Okay, what if we just do the smile somewhere on the cake? Like, underneath the Happy UnBirthday, Jemma part?" He snagged one of Steve's pencils and tapped on the table as he tried to brainstorm more ideas along with him, ignoring the look of offense Steve gave him. "Oh, maybe we could do striped layers with food coloring like we did with that anniversary cake for our dads? The Cheshire Cat is striped, so we can integrate that into the cake and just have the eyes and smile on the outside like he's blended into the cake."

Steve responded with an uncertain expression. It was almost disturbed for some reason.

"Okay, yeah, but…"

"But what?"

"But won't that just seem like we're _eating_ the Cheshire Cat?"

"I—"

There was a long pause of silence until they both let out a laugh.

"Okay, uh, then maybe one of the layers can have fondant stripes in the Cheshire Cat colors? You know, something more abstract, less creepy?"

"That's not a bad idea," Steve said, studying the plain sketch again as if trying to picture it. "Are you sure we can't do a teapot?" Clint stopped tapping the pencil and raised one eyebrow. "I mean, it shouldn't be too hard in theory, right? A couple of bunt pans and fondant or molding chocolate for the handle, spout and lid seems like it would do the trick. I think a teapot would make a great top layer."

"Huh." Clint pursed his lips and nodded as he tried to picture it even as Steve started sketching it out. "Yeah, I guess that could work. I guess we could try and have a back up top layer just in case?"

"Good idea," Steve agreed.

They sat in near silence again as Steve continued fleshing out the teapot layer, the only sound the scratch of Steve's pencil against the paper and the tap of the pencil Clint has started up again. The silence didn't last long, silence rarely did in their house, as Thor and Loki entered the room, Bruce with them.

"Of course, dad, we know the rules," Thor was saying. "And I'm 18 now, remember?"

"18 or not, you're still in school and technically my responsibility," Bruce countered and Steve snorted quietly.

Clint guessed that hadn’t gone over as a great excuse when he'd turned 18. Then again, Steve had only been 17 when he'd been a senior, like Clint and Loki, whereas Thor was already 18. Clint had wondered if he'd been held back, but it was just another incident of the confusing rules about who can start school at what age from one school district to another. He always figured he'd be the oldest in the senior class since he was born the first week of January as opposed to the last week of December, but he was kind of grateful now that he wasn't.

"And even if you were 25," Bruce continued, stopping next to the table and looking at the sketch appraisingly, "I would still urge you to make good choices if I could."

"Not 25, but can confirm," Steve chimed in.

"Alright, father," Loki interjected, "we understand and will be on our best behavior. As it is, it's likely to be boring as hell anyhow. I'm only going to gape at the wildlife in their natural habitat."

Clint snorted as did Bruce. "Honestly, Loki," Bruce said, "at least try to have fun that doesn't involve maligning your peers for once?"

"I'll try for you, father," Loki said as he left the room, "but no promises."

"Is he ever going to outgrow this phase?" Steve asked Bruce once Thor had gone too.

"Let's not use that word," Bruce replied. "It's not fair to assume anything a person does is a phase. If your brother is antisocial, he's antisocial. Anything else that seems more troubling, well, you leave that to me to handle, okay?" Then, changing the subject, he said, "That looks ambitious so far."

"You should have seen his other sketch," Clint said. Bruce hummed.

"Wait, where are Thor and Loki even going that they're actually going together?" Steve didn't seem to want to change the subject.

"Just a party Bobbi Morse is throwing for seniors," Clint answered with a hitch of a shoulder.

"And you're not going?" Steve gave him a confused look.

"Kind of can't plan an elaborate birthday cake for a spoiled almost-eight-year-old if I go to a party," Clint replied, narrowing his eyes at him.

"Got that," Steve said breezily, "but Bobbi invited you?"

"Yeah."

"So, the same Bobbi that you've been crazy about for however long invited you to a party and you said no? Even though you and me can just as easily work on this tomorrow morning?"

Clint blinked several times, his stomach flipping.

"You know, you can probably still catch them before they leave," Bruce suggested and Clint looked at him. "I can talk to your father for you."

"And I could always watch _Alice In Wonderland_ for research while you're gone," Steve offered with a teasing smile.

Clint didn't waste another moment. He jumped up from his seat and hurried after Thor and Loki.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. Pithins and Alvarez are based on characters in similar roles in the comics, I want to say in the 80s/90s runs, but don't quote me.  
> 2\. Idk why I just love the idea of itty bitty Steve having a stuffed bear (especially after all of the fan art with Cap Bear and Bucky Bear and so on).


	4. Blood and Water

"Thor! Thor! Thor! Thor!"

The rush of chants and cheers and other commentary drove Thor on as he swallowed down the rest of his eleventh pop-tart and reached for another. He'd been bet that he couldn't consume a full sixteen count box of the breakfast pastries in less than five minutes and so naturally he was determined to prove otherwise.

"You think this is nuts," Clint was saying to Val, "you should see him down a 120-count bag of pizza rolls." Thor nodded energetically as he worked hard on getting through his twelfth. 

"It's absolutely revolting," Loki commented with a sneer.

Thor scowled, swallowing the rest of the pop-tart, and said as he reached for another, "I seem to recall you attempting to beat me at that particular challenge and failing miserably."

Loki rolled his eyes and left the kitchen, probably to find one of his drama club friends instead.

"No offense, but you weren't wrong about your brother being a bit of an asshole," Val commented.

In spite of himself, Thor frowned. Loki was still his brother, his only blood relation at that and even if he didn’t think of any of his other siblings as lesser, there was still a very small extra bond between the two of them in having come from the same situation.

"He is," he said, mouth full before swallowing, "but he's really not all bad."

Val lifted an eyebrow and then looked at Clint beside her. He shrugged and said, "Yeah, I guess there's a heart under all that misanthropy. Deep, deep, _deep_ under," he added.

"One minute left!" somebody shouted.

"He's got two more to go," said someone else.

Thor returned his full might to the challenge, blocking out thoughts of his brother, or anything else other than consuming two more pop-tarts.

"45 seconds."

Thor swallowed the rest of the fourteenth pop-tart and looked at the last packet, contemplating what he was going to do next for a mere few seconds before ripping open the package. There were varying reactions as he broke both in half and put all four pieces into his mouth at once.

"Shit," Clint muttered. "If you get sick, I'm not helping clean it up."

"Damn, look at them jaws go," Val remarked, tone and expression highly impressed. "I bet you'd be a freak at oral."

"Yeah, that's not something everyone present really wants to think about," Clint retorted dryly and Thor nearly choked on the pop-tarts that had quickly turned to sugary paste in his mouth. He narrowed his eyes at the younger boy and Clint threw up his hands. "Sorry. Just stating facts."

"10 seconds! 9!" Everyone joined in with a chant of the final seconds.

With sheer willpower, Thor swallowed down the rest of the gaumy-textured treats, took a swig of soda and then opened his mouth for all to see, just in the nick of time. Everyone around him burst out into cheers and applause.

"Impressive," came an unfamiliar voice and Thor looked straight ahead to see one of the most beautiful girl he'd ever laid eyes on.

She was tall and had a slender, athletic build. Her dark hair was pulled up in a pony tail, accentuating just how long it was. But it was her eyes... Her eyes were stunning and, as corny as he knew it was, seemed to see every part of him – inside and out – at once.

"Tiffany!" Val exclaimed, seeming surprised. She turned and pulled the other girl into a fierce hug. "What are you doing here?"

"Bobbi invited me," the girl, Tiffany, answered. "We take classes at the same martial arts studio. And look at you," she said, pulling back from the hug and looking around, "making friends at your new school just like I said you would." Her eyes stopped on him and Thor offered a smile on reflex.

"Yes, Val here is already a great addition to S.H.I.E.L.D.," Thor praised her.

"You sound like a teacher," Tiffany said with a small snort.

"I—" Thor fumbled. "Well, yes, I guess I do, but—"

"Alright, Tif, leave my new friends alone," Val intervened with a chuckle. "Guys, this is my best friend, Tiffany. Tif, this is Clint and Thor. They're part of that crazy rich family with thirteen kids," she said in a loud whisper.

"Oh, I know who Clint is," Tiffany replied. "Although, from the way Bobbi talks, I always imagined you'd be a bit taller in person."

"Woah, woah, woah," Clint said in an eager tone. "Bobbi talks about me? Good things? Bad things?"

"How about you figure that out for yourself instead of ignoring her all the time?"

"What?" Clint scoffed. "I don't ignore her. She ignores me!" Clint stalked off and Thor winced.

"Something tells me that isn't going to end well for him."

"That or they'll end up married," Val suggested. Then the girl eyed him curiously. "What about you? Any relationship drama?"

"Besides with my brother?" he asked with a cheeky grin, knowing she meant of a romantic nature. “But that would be a no.”

“Are you offering to change that, Val?” Tiffany asked, giving the other girl a sly look.

Thor's eyes widened. Val was great company, but he wasn't sure he was interested in her that way.

“Definitely not,” Val answered with a shake of her head. “I just don't think I'd make a very good Lady Sif,” she teased, winking. “And,” she lowered her voice, “there's this girl I've been sending signals to and I think she's sending them back so, if you'll excuse me.” Val looked at them both with a small smirk before leaving them.

Thor wasn't sure if she'd done so deliberately because his interest in Tiffany was obvious or if it was merely a lucky coincidence, but Thor seized the opportunity. “So I guess the role of Sif is still open,” he tried his best to be smooth, “if you're interested. Your name even lends itself well to it.”

Tiffany looked lifted an eyebrow, but not without a smile. “Wasn't Sif a blonde?”

Thor smiled back and hitched a shoulder. “Well, there's never anything wrong with a little creative license.”

 

* * *

 

Loki glanced at the hour on his phone a third time and let out a long sigh. He debated just hitching a ride with someone else rather than waiting for Thor and Clint. If they wanted to test their dads' goodwill when it came to extensively broken curfews, that was on them. Even he had his limits when it came to defiance and that was one of them. Of course, he had a feeling his father would lump him in with the punishment for ditching the other two without further effort, so with another sigh he began searching the party a second time.

Spotting Val, Loki decided to recruit her help. "Have you seen dumb and dumber?"

She gave him a curious glance. "Would that make you dumbest in this trio?" she retorted.

He rolled his eyes. "We are not a trio, no matter what Thor seems to think. But they  _are_ family and, as such, we're all subject to the same curfew, so if you've seen them," he pressed, leaving the point dangling.

She rolled her eyes back before answering, "Last I saw Thor he was out back with my friend Tif. I haven't seen Clint for a while. Maybe check one of the upstairs bedrooms," she teased.

"Oh no," Loki said, holding up his hands. "I'd much rather risk missing curfew."

Val snorted. "Fair enough. I guess—" She paused and looked past him, eyes narrowing.

Loki turned to follow her line of vision. He narrowed his own eyes at seeing Bobbi hanging all over a few other partygoers, seemingly drunk or on her way to it. He looked back at Val, who hitched a shoulder, before deciding on confronting the other girl.

"Bobbi," he spoke in a low tone, his classmate giggling with her friends, "have you seen Clint?"

The girl's giggles turned to a scowl. "He's down at the beach being a meanie, but I don't want to talk about him." The scowl turned into a quivering pout and she shook her head, looking at the girl beside her. "I don't want to talk about him," she repeated.

Loki held in his groan until after she'd been led away to be consoled. Even if it was a bit ludicrous for her to get drunk and cry over Clint of all people, he was in no mood to escalate things further by making that thought heard.

Loki sent another text to Thor, not that any of the others had been answered, and then made his way out of the house and down the road to the stretch of beach Bobbi's house was located near. Sure enough, Loki noticed many of his classmates among the many late night beachgoers and more than a few of them seemed to have had consumed alcohol. He had a sinking feeling in his gut that Clint might be among those who had.

"By Odin, if that idiot so much as touched a drop, I'm leaving him and Thor to—" Loki stopped abruptly. "Damn it," he muttered before picking up his pace. "What the hell are you doing?" he shouted when he reached the shoreline. "Trying to get yourself drowned?"

"Maybe," Clint called back, not bothering to move from his asinine position out in the ocean, near enough to where Loki knew it dropped off into deeper water. It was a precarious place for the other boy to be if he was even a little tipsy, which Loki still suspected. It would be far too easy for him to lose his footing if a particularly strong tide were to come in. "Might solve my problems."

Loki's eyes widened. He contemplated calling his father for about three seconds before realizing that might not be the best idea considering the amount of drunk people about. In lieu of a better plan, and begrudging himself for caring enough to even bother, Loki waded out to where Clint was.

"What the hell are _you_ doing?" Clint spun around and Loki could just barely make out the confusion in his eyes before he kneed the other boy hard enough that he toppled forward.

Loki caught him and started dragging him back to the beach, Clint protesting the entire way. Once there, he deposited him ungraciously on the ground and took a few steps back, breathing heavily from the exertion and feeling like giving him a swift kick for having had to get his clothes ruined.

"What. The. _Fuck_!?" Clint yelled at him.

"No, no, no, you don't get to yell at me," Loki answered, shaking his head. "You're the one contemplating suicide over some fucking girl."

" _What?_ " Clint looked up at him with a dubious expression before standing to his feet, though not without a little effort. "Okay, first off, asshole, I'm not suicidal. I was being melodramatic. Thought you of all people would recognize that. Second of all, leave Bobbi out of this. It's not any of your business."

"Oh sure, fine," Loki hissed. "Then by all means, go home drunk. My father will smell it the second you step in the house." Clint tensed and Loki realized he had his attention finally. "And I'm sure your father won't be too happy about it if he finds out. Only we both know my father will go to bat for you, even if the one thing in the world he detests is alcohol. He'll help you get sober and nurse your hangover even if he'll have nightmares for d—"

"I'm not drunk," Clint interjected, his voice strangled.

"And I don't believe you."

"I'm not, honest," Clint insisted. "I drank a little, and I wanted to drink more, I won't lie. But I'm just a little fuzzy. I was tipsy for a little bit, maybe, but that was a while ago. I'm, I'm just fuzzy now."

Loki looked him over before sighing and turning around, looking at the ocean. "Whatever. Even if it was just one drink, my father will still know."

"Yeah, I kind of realized that a few drinks in. It's why I stopped. That and my own dad," Clint said. "I don't want to become that person. No matter how easy it would have been to just keep going. To just…forget. For a little bit."

"For fuck's sake," Loki rolled his eyes, "Bobbi Morse is not the only—"

"It's not Bobbi," Clint cut him off. "Not _just_. It's a lot of things. It's Bobbi, it's crushing on people you have zero chance with, it's being a senior, it's thinking about college, it's not knowing what the hell I'm supposed to do with my future, what I'm expected to do, it's… It's just a lot of things. And I want my brain to go back to not caring about this shit. I want to just shut my brain off." Loki glanced sidelong at the other boy. "But I can't," Clint said with a shake of his head. "Not like that."

"And drowning yourself was a better option?" Loki asked in a sardonic tone.

Clint groaned. "I wasn't trying to drown myself. I was ditching the rest of the alcohol where Bobbi couldn't get to it. She's not really fond of going out into the ocean so I figured she wouldn't try and stop me."

"Ah, so that's why she said you were being a meanie."

Clint snorted, but didn't say anything in response to that. They stood in silence for a long moment and it was extremely uncomfortable.

Disliking it immensely, Loki broke it with, "Unless you want an interrogation when we get home, we should probably avoid breaking curfew."

"Good call," Clint agreed as Loki took the initiative, turning to head back toward Bobbi's house. "Thanks, by the way." Loki paused, but didn't look at the other boy. "I mean, your methods might be a little questionable, but hey, it's the thought that counts, right?"

Loki considered denying it, but Clint, regardless of Loki's disparaging him and Thor earlier, was actually one of the sharpest of their bunch. Loki had played his hand too openly in this situation for Clint to believe otherwise.

Instead he said, "You know, you're not the only one uncertain about the future." He turned to look at him again. "In case you haven't noticed, I don't exactly like people. And since I'm trying to avoid a future in prison," Clint snorted at his deadpan remark, "that doesn't exactly leave a lot of appealing options for me."

Clint nodded solemnly and then replied, "Well, you could always become a politician."

That surprised a laugh from Loki. "I suppose I could."

 

* * *

 

"Oh, come on!" Bruce groaned as he landed on yet another property with a hotel on it, this one owned by Peter. The boy laughed ruthlessly and Harley and Pietro joined in, seeing as Bruce had landed on their built-up properties the previous two turns. "Can I just go to jail?" he asked as he started counting through his money to see if he even had enough left to pay. "I'd rather just be in jail."

He looked at Tony with a smirk. The other man had been sent to the jail space just about every other turn so far and had been complaining about it the whole time.

"Seriously?" Tony asked. "You guys bought up all the spaces and I can't even collect money. If I land on just about any space I'm done for."

Bruce chuckled and looked at his cash and assets. "Yeah, well, I'm pretty sure I'm done for too. Banker," he said to Pietro, "I need you to cash out some of these properties for me to pay my debts."

Pietro took the properties Bruce handed him and began collecting money in exchange. Bruce shared a smile with Tony at seeing him do so without complaining, having gained more confidence with his money-math skills over the course of the game. 

“Um,” Pietro was thumbing through the fake money, biting his lip, “unless I counted wrong, I don’t think there’s enough here.” He looked up at Bruce and shrugged.

Bruce sighed melodramatically. “I had a feeling. Guess I’m the first one to bankrupt. Not surprising really,” he added with a chuckle.

“Hey now,” Tony interjected, sounding offended, if only in jest, “you’re marrying a billionaire. No need to talk like that.”

“A billionaire with a rap sheet a mile long apparently,” Bruce teased back.

Tony frowned at him as he took his turn, rolling the dice and then shouting, "Oh _come on_!"

Bruce couldn't help it and laughed at his expense when Tony was forced to pay another fine.

"I still have a card you can buy," Harley offered with a smirk and Bruce snickered a few times more, shaking his head as he did. 

"For the last time, I'm not paying your scalper price," Tony told him.

Bruce's smile fell and his stomach curdled at the sudden, unexpected smell of alcohol, faint as it was, and Tony must have noticed his discomfort because his own playful expression fell away and he looked at him in concern.

Before Bruce could say anything, Clint's voice interjected, "Hey, if he's not willing to pay up then don't waver, Harls. Dad of all people should know the importance of making a profit."

"Ahahaha," Tony deadpanned, though his eyes didn't move away from Bruce.

Bruce glanced at Clint, Loki and Thor as they gathered around the game table, noting how all three of them looked in varying states of disarray, and then back at Tony.

"Hey, since I'm bankrupt," Bruce said, "I think I'm going to go have a chat with our seniors in the other room."

He saw the confused glance Tony gave him as he stood to his feet, but he didn't explain further. The three older boys followed behind him as he led them away from the three younger.

"Told you," he heard Loki mutter under his breath. Bruce winced, but he willed himself to remain neutral for the time being.

Once he was satisfied they were in a more private space, Bruce stopped. Not turning to face them, he took a deep breath and looked straight ahead at nothing in particular. "There was alcohol at the party," he stated evenly. "And I know at least one of you had some."

"What?" Bruce turned around quickly to see Tony had followed as well and was looking back and forth between him and the boys. "Since I trust your dad's instincts on this, you have about five seconds to tell us what you were thinking." Tony folded his arms.

Bruce sighed and moved to stand beside Tony. He was angry too, but he'd been preparing himself for this inevitable possibility for years. Before there was any answer he interjected more calmly, "Look, this isn't about wanting to keep you from ever drinking," he said. He then glanced at Tony and hitched a shoulder. "At least, that's not my intention since I know not everyone abuses it."

Tony nodded. "Right, and I know it seems hypocritical of me to freak out," he looked back at the boys, "when you all know what I was like as a teenager. I can't exactly hide that part of my past."

"But," Bruce continued, "this _is_ about you breaking house rules."

"Not to mention the law," Tony added, perhaps a bit dramatically, "but again, I'm not trying to be a hypocrite here. I just don't want to see any of you lose control or think the only way to enjoy your youth is by being so smashed you don't recall half of it."

The three boys looked down at the ground, but still made no move to respond.

Tony sighed and Bruce glanced at him, watching as he let his arms fall back down to his side. Tony met his gaze as he continued, "So, I guess the question is which of you were drinking? Or was it all of you?" He looked back, eyes narrowing in scrutiny. "Thor, you're looking a little queasy."

Bruce glanced at his second oldest son in study and, sure enough, he looked even worse than he thought he had when the boys had first come home. "Thor?"

"I, uh—" Thor started.

"It wasn't him," Clint interrupted. "The bonehead just decided to eat sixteen pop-tarts."

Bruce's eyes widened. "Well, that's not exactly a great choice either," he said honestly.

"It wasn't Loki either," Clint continued. "It was me."

"In that case," Tony said, "Thor, Loki, you can go. Although, you might want to take something for the indigestion," he added to Thor.

"Let me guess," Clint asked when it was just the three of them, "grounded until I graduate?" 

Bruce shared a look with Tony and knew immediately they were on the same page. He looked back at Clint and shook his head. "No. Not this time at least."

"Instead of grounding you," Tony said slowly, "I'd rather know what you were thinking. Because I remember all the things that led me to drink when I was your age and my dad didn't seem to think it might be because there was a problem. I want you to feel like you can talk to me, even about this." He shrugged, as if at a loss, and Bruce placed a hand on his back in solidarity.

"I…" Clint glanced away. "Bobbi and I got into a sort of… I don't know if you'd call it an argument. We were mad at each other, but also hanging out. Then there was alcohol and," he shrugged, "just seemed like the thing to do. But it didn't make things better," he said and shook his head before looking back at them. "I kept thinking about what mom would say. I…I remembered how it was when you were drunk when we were kids." Bruce felt Tony's muscles tense under his hand. "I even remembered how terrible your dad was," he said, looking at Bruce then. He shrugged again. "So, I stopped drinking before I could get drunk. Only, I realized what it was doing to Bobbi and…it was confusing. I didn't like what it was doing to her, but part of me wished I could have kept drinking. Part of me wondered if…" He let his sentence trail and looked down.

Tony moved to stand directly in front of Clint and placed his hands on his shoulders. "I have a pretty good idea what you might have wondered." Clint looked up at him in surprise and, from where Bruce stood back watching the scene, maybe even hopefulness. "Maybe life is easier if you don't have to think so hard about stuff?"

"Yeah, something like that," Clint admitted and Bruce wondered at how much he must like this Morse girl if he thought about drowning his sorrows in alcohol. Or was there something else? A thought nagged at the back of his mind, but he couldn't quite reach it and pull it forward. "But like I said, I thought of you guys and mom and figured it probably wasn't a good idea to give it a try."

"Well," Tony said, and his voice sounded a little strained, "I hope you never feel you need to give it a try. But I guess this is part of growing up and becoming your own person. As much as I hate that idea, I'm proud of how you handled it tonight. You were honest with us and maybe you didn't make the best choice the first time, but you did the second time." After a small pause he added, "Bet your head hurts."

"Like hell."

"Go take something for it and lay down. Do you feel sick to your stomach at all?" Clint shook his head. "No? Well, I'm going to be checking in on you all night just in case. You can consider that your punishment." He nodded his head for Clint to go do as directed.

"You're ruining my life," Clint replied in a sardonic tone before leaving.

"Now that it's happened, I'm glad I didn't have to tackle the topic of drinking without support," Bruce mused aloud. "I—"

Tony suddenly gasped and slumped forward, hands on his knees, breathing heavily.

Bruce immediately forgot what he was saying and hurried to check on him, heart racing. "Tony! Tony, are you okay?" He realized upon closer inspection that Tony was having a panic attack. "Hey, Tony, I'm here. It's Bruce. You're okay. You're at home and everything is okay. All of your children are safe. You're breathing in and out deeply." Tony followed the cue. "That's good. In and out. You're okay."

"Not," Tony choked out, standing up straight and shaking his head. He had a pained expression on his face. He looked at Bruce and there was cold fear in his eyes. "What if he ends up like me?"

Bruce swallowed hard in understanding and pushed aside the way that dragged up his own past. He pulled Tony into his arms and soothed him without words for several long moments.

Finally he answered in a quiet voice, "He'll be an amazing man who may have made mistakes but learned from them." He pulled back and looked at Tony tenderly before adding, "And this Bobbi, or anyone else who comes along, will be lucky to have him. As will his kids if he has any. That's what will happen if he ends up like you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. In the comics, Tif/Tiffany is one of Sif's many human aliases. I considered using a few of the others, particularly Ericka since I recall her being Ericka in the 90s. But I went with Tif since it is her most recent human alias, afaik, and obviously very similar to Sif.   
> 2\. The blonde/creative license bit is obviously a reference to Lady Sif's appearance in the comics. At one point she WAS blonde (like the goddess in Norse mythology), but at some point in the late 90s or early 2000s, I can't remember, she came to have dark hair instead. And obviously MCU cast with that take on her character in mind.   
> 3\. This chapter was one of the earliest written ones for this story and even reading it back it has some of my favorite moments/exchanges.


	5. Jemma in Wonderland

Jemma twirled several times in her party dress. It was a blue similar to Alice's, only the bottom was made of the same material as a ballerina's tutu. It was a pretty dress that made her feel pretty in it. 

After a few more spins, Jemma stopped twirling and looked into the mirror. She tilted her head and scrunched her nose as she studied her reflection very carefully. She was eight now and not seven, but even though she felt pretty she didn't _look_ any different than the day before. Tilting her head to the other side, she tried to remember what she looked like on her last birthday.

She had gotten a little taller according to her dad, but she didn't feel any taller since everyone else was still bigger than her. Her feet had gotten bigger and she'd had to get new shoes. Peter teased her that her ears were bigger, but Tony had said that wasn't true. She was missing more teeth than on her last birthday, she considered with a frown. And new teeth had started growing in and, boy, did they hurt.

Jemma was startled from her thoughts by a soft knock on the bathroom door.

"Hey, birthday girl, you almost ready for me?" Jemma hurried over to the door and opened it for her cousin Jennifer. "Oh my goodness," she exclaimed and Jemma stepped back and twirled again, smiling as she did. "You look absolutely amazing, Jemma."

"Thanks, Cousin Jen."

"You're welcome. Now, let's get started on giving you those curls you asked for."

"Yes!" Jemma cheered.

Her eyes then widened as Jennifer laid out some items on the sink and she spotted make-up. She looked up at Jennifer's reflection in the mirror and her cousin winked.

"Just a little glitter blush and lip gloss," Jennifer explained. "It's your special day so leave your dad and Tony to me if they freak out, okay?"

Jemma looked at the make-up and then at her cousin again, smiling wide. "Okay," she said with a nod.

It took what felt like forever, but eventually Jennifer finished curling her hair, putting some of it into a bow, and applying the make-up. The whole time Jemma couldn't see her reflection, so she didn't know how it was turning out and that made the time seem to go even slower.

"Alright, Jem," Jennifer finally said, "you ready to see how you look?"

"Am I _ever_ ," Jemma answered with a relieved sigh.

Jennifer giggled and said, "Okay, then. All done."

Jemma turned toward the mirror and her mouth fell open. Her dad had never curled her hair like this before and neither had Aunt Betty when she'd tried once for her when she'd asked. She loved it! Her cheeks were pink and glittery, and her lips matched. Now she felt like she was eight instead of seven.

"So pretty!" she exclaimed and then hugged her cousin. "Thanks, Jen!"

"Well," she said as she returned the hug, "you're beautiful without the make-up and curls, but I'm glad you like how it turned out, sweetheart." Jennifer pulled away. "Now, your dad is probably bursting at the seams to see how you look and I know the others are getting antsy for your party, so I'd say it's time for you to go wow them. What do you say?"

"I say I don't want to be late for a very important date."

Jennifer smiled and then looked at the ceiling. "JARVIS, is the party ready for its guest of honor?"

"Cousin Jen," Jemma corrected with a giggle, "you don't have to look at the ceiling when you talk to JARVIS."

"Right, right," Jennifer replied, "I guess I'm still not quite used to it, uh, him."

_It's quite alright, Ms. Walters_ , JARVIS replied. _As for Jemma's party, Mr. Stark and Dr. Banner have indicated that the party is just about ready, but it is imperative that Jemma wait for a white rabbit._

Jemma's eyes grew wide and she looked up at her cousin. "A white rabbit?"

"Well," Jennifer seemed just as surprised as she shrugged, "I guess that's only right. So, will the rabbit come here or—"

There was a knock on the bedroom door and JARVIS answered, _I believe the rabbit will come to you_.

Jemma looked between the door and Jennifer a couple of times before going to open it. To her surprise there _was_ a white rabbit. A large, white rabbit made of plush.

She reached out and carefully took it only to gasp and drop it when she saw who had brought it to her. They blinked at each other several times, not saying anything. 

Then Jemma threw her arms around him and exclaimed, "Leo!" He didn't push her back like he sometimes did, because boys could be annoying like that, but returned the hug instead. "I've missed you," she said and almost wanted to cry because of how happy she was that he was there.

Jemma hadn't known that Leo was coming even though she had wanted very much to invite him. She hadn't seen him in so long. The last time they had talked they had fought and she had said she never wanted to be his friend again. But that wasn't true and she had missed him so much. Maybe it was true at first, but then she started to miss talking to him even if there was nothing to talk about. She had started to miss him, but she never asked her dad if she could call him because she was afraid he might still be mad at her. 

"Why are you crying?" Leo asked her, pulling out of the hug and looking at her with a worried expression. Jemma hadn't even realized she _had_ started crying. Leo gulped and looked down at his feet. "Are you mad I'm here? I know you said we weren't friends anymore."

Jemma wanted to stomp her foot and ask him why he always had to be so stupid, but she didn't want to make him mad again so instead she hugged him again and answered, "No! I'm happy you're here. _That's_ why I'm crying."

"That doesn't make sense, but okay," Leo replied. "I missed you too," he said when they stopped hugging again. He shrugged. "I was afraid we really wouldn't ever be friends again. My mom said I could call and you'd probably forgive me, but I guess I was kind of mean and… I'm sorry. I was just…just…upset."

"Jemma's dad told me about the fight you two had," Jennifer spoke softly. "Leo, were you upset that Jemma was making new friends?" she asked. "Were you afraid she would like them more than you?"

Jemma looked at her cousin. Jennifer had picked up the plush rabbit and was looking at Leo with a face that kind of looked like one her dad made, only a little different since she was a woman instead of a man. Jemma looked back at Leo and he looked at her before nodding and looking down at the floor again.

"But I guess it's okay if you end up liking them more than me," Leo said with another shrug. "I don't want you to, but I don't want to not be your friend at all either." Now Leo sounded like _he_ wanted to cry.

"This is why I keep saying you're stupid," Jemma couldn't stop herself from saying and his head jerked up quickly. He looked confused. " _You're_ my best friend. I don't want to like them more than I like you. Even when you make me mad," she added.

"But you said no take backs until the end of time," Leo reminded her.

"Because you hurt my feelings," she reminded him. He frowned.

"You know," Jennifer interrupted, "sometimes people say things they don't mean when they're hurt or mad. Leo, I'm sure you didn't want to say mean things to Jemma, but you did because you didn't know how else to say how you really felt, which was scared and jealous. That doesn't make it right, but it does mean you didn't mean the things you said. And that's true for Jemma. You didn't really mean that you didn't want to be friends with Leo anymore, did you?"

"No," Jemma answered, shaking her head. 

"You just didn't know what else to say because you were sad and angry. And maybe you thought he didn't really want to be friends with you." Jennifer held out the rabbit. Jemma took it and hugged it close as she listened. "So, if you want a grown-up's advice, I think that means you never _stopped_ being friends. You just needed a little time to be hurt and that's okay. Now you can be happy again. Make sense?"

Jemma nodded and looked at Leo to see what he thought. He was nodding too and then he met her gaze, smiling hopefully. Jemma smiled back.

"Cousin Jen is right," she decided. "We didn't stop being friends no matter what I said. And," she smiled wider, "remember, you promised me that if we're really best friends we'll be best friends forever. So, you have to keep it. No take backs."

Leo smiled wider too. "No take backs," he said with a shake of his head. He then looked between her and Jennifer before saying, "Um, I think I'm supposed to bring you to the party now. If you're ready." He blinked several times and looked away. "I mean, you look ready and your dad said I could come get you."

Jemma scrunched her face. Leo looked like he was blushing for some reason. She looked up at Jennifer and her cousin was smiling like she knew a secret. Jemma wanted to ask, but she also didn't want to make everyone wait too long either, so she held out the plush rabbit and asked, "Cousin Jen, can you hold him?"

"Of course."

"Thank you," Jemma said when Jennifer had taken it and then turned toward Leo again. "Okay, I’m ready," she declared and took her best friend by the hand. Leo squirmed for a minute and she wondered if he was going to act like it was weird or gross, but he didn't say anything, and they made their way to the party.

 

* * *

 

"Look at its nose," Leo said and imitated wiggling his own.

Jemma giggled and tried wiggling her nose too.

"Maybe she's hungry," Tripp suggested.

"Maybe so," the woman who had brought the bunny petting zoo said. "Would you guys like to feed them? They'll eat right out of your hand."

"Yeah!" Jemma's friends and a few of her siblings cheered, crowding around the large table that held the bunnies.

Jemma backed away from the table, still holding one of the bunnies and petting her gently. She would wait until the others had turns first because it was the nice thing to do.

"Having a good time so far?" her dad asked. He and Aunt Betty came over to stand beside her.

"It's the best birthday ever," she answered. "Leo is here and he's talking to my other friends and I never expected bunnies!"

"And I didn't expect you to be wearing make-up," her dad said.

Aunt Betty laughed. "Honestly, Bruce. She's not wearing mascara or eyeliner. She's not even wearing lipstick."

"She's already a year older," her dad said. "Excuse me if I'm a little overwhelmed thinking about my little girl growing up and doing big girl things like, well, like wearing make-up I didn't buy in the toy aisle."

"Do you want to hold Flower to make you feel better?" Jemma asked him.

He smiled down at her and shook his head. "No, I'm just taking a break from setting up the table with the tea party snacks, so I probably shouldn't touch any of the rabbits," he answered. "But thank you. Flower here is definitely adorable."

"I like her name," Aunt Betty said.

"Thanks! I thought Tony would like it since he got the bunnies to come and he likes flowers."

"Uh oh," Aunt Betty then said for some reason.

"Um, Jem, sweetheart, are you saying _you_ named her?" Her dad asked, and she nodded. "That's a really nice sentiment and I'm sure Tony would be pleased, but you know that the bunny can't stay with us, right?"

Jemma looked down at the fluffy animal in her arms with a pout. She brought it close to her head so that she could nuzzle it. "I know," she said sadly. "But…" She took a deep breath and finished, "But maybe we could get a bunny of our own and name her Flower too?" She looked up at her dad hopefully.

"Uh, I… I don't…"

"Hey, want to see a trick?" Tony interrupted, coming over to them.

"Say no," Happy said as she and Pepper followed behind.

"Yes," Jemma said anyways.

Tony smiled brightly and held out his party top hat. "This may look like an ordinary top hat, but if you say the magic words, Jemmus Eightus Partius…"

"Jemmus Eightus Partius!" Jemma repeated while her dad chuckled.

Tony pulled one of the bunnies out of the hat with a triumphant, "Ta-da!"

Jemma laughed. "You had him in there the whole time!"

"No way. He magically appeared from the table over there. Scout's honor!"

"Don't believe him, Jemma," Aunt Betty said. "Something tells me your almost-stepdad was never a Scout."

"He definitely wasn't," her dad agreed.

"Skeptics. The lot of you." Tony shook his head as he put the hat back on his head. He then held the bunny up to his face and said, "You know the truth, don't you, Bugs?"

Jemma's eyes widened. "Do you want a pet bunny too?"

"Wait, huh?" Tony blinked at her and then looked at her dad.

"Jemma wants a pet bunny," her dad explained. "I think I'll head back to setting up the tea party and let almost-stepdad handle this one."

Tony watched him go before looking back to look at her with a nervous expression. He then looked between Aunt Betty and Pepper a few times. When he looked back at her again he slowly smiled. 

"Hey, I get it," he shrugged, "these little guys are adorable. Adorable just like you," he added and moved the bunny in his hands close to her face so that its nose tickled hers and made her giggle softly. "But they're also a very big responsibility," he continued. "Trust me. I looked into getting a pet bunny a long time ago and found out it's not something you do without a lot of planning and consideration."

"I'm responsible," Jemma said. "I take care of Hulk all the time."

"You are," he nodded, "and if anyone could take care of a pet bunny it would definitely be you. So, if you still want one a little later after we've talked some more about it and maybe you've done some reading up on how to care for them properly, well, then I'll be in your corner. Sound like a deal?"

"Deal."

"Great," Tony said with a smile. He then looked at Aunt Betty. "How do you think almost-stepdad handled it?"

She chuckled. "I'll be glad to give a good report to Bruce when he asks."

"You did good, Tony," Pepper agreed. She then looked at her and asked, "Jemma, do you want to take a quick little walk with me? I have something I'd like to ask you, but it's a bit of a secret."

Jemma scrunched her face, wondering what it could be. She then looked at Tony. "May I?"

"You may," Tony answered. "Just make sure to bring Thumper there back before the petting zoo leaves."

"Her name isn't Thumper, it's Flower," she corrected him before following Pepper, who was laughing a little at her remark.

"Don't worry," Pepper said, "it'll be quick."

Jemma and Pepper walked one of the paths that wound around the house away from the side yard they had been in. As they walked, Pepper asked her if she was enjoying her birthday, if she was excited to be a year older, and other nice questions all while Jemma stroked Flower's soft fur and answered them.

Jemma knew that if they continued to follow the path they would end up in the garden where her dad, Jennifer, Steve and Clint were helping set up the tea party. Nobody wanted her to see the finished party until it was time, so Jemma wasn't surprised when Pepper stopped before they reached it and turned back around.

Since Pepper hadn't said anything more about a secret, Jemma wondered if she had changed her mind. Then Pepper stopped and held out a hand to gently stop her as well.

"Is everything okay?" Jemma asked her. "Is it a good secret or a bad secret?"

Pepper smiled kindly at her and her eyes sparkled. "It's a good secret," she answered. "A very good secret. And it's one that I would like to share with everyone if you'll let me."

"Why wouldn't I let you?" Jemma asked, not understanding.

"Well, it's your special day and it wouldn't be nice of me to make it about me without asking you."

Jemma considered it for a long moment. "I guess that makes sense."

"So, I'm going to share the secret with you first and then it's completely up to you if you want to let me share it. If you say no, I understand. Promise. I can always share it later."

"Okay." Jemma nodded and waited to hear what this good secret might be.

 

* * *

 

"Okay, sweetheart, you can open your eyes now."

Jemma did as instructed and gasped at the sight of all of her friends and family gathered around a very long table that looked like something out of a fairytale. It was even more magical than the tea party at Valentine's Day or even at DisneyWorld.

Before she could say anything else, everyone started singing _Happy Birthday_ , only everyone changed the word to _Unbirthday_ instead. Her dad and Tony led her over to the table as everyone sang, and she was able to get a closer look at how amazing it was. It was lined with tea cups and flowers and cookies and sandwiches and more. But the most amazing thing was the cake that sat in the very center of it all. She hurried over to look closer at it.

The cake had three layers. The bottom layer was the same striped color as the Cheshire cat from the Disney movie. The middle layer was decorated in a way that resembled the colors of the Queen of Hearts and her card soldiers. That layer was lined with eight large, lit candles. On top of that was a layer that looked like a tea pot tipping over ever so slightly, only instead of tea it poured out a blue banner that said _Happy Unbirthday, Jemma_.

Everyone finished the song and cheered, a few tacking on "and many more" among other silly things. That was followed by shouts for her to make a wish and blow out the candles.

Jemma looked at the cake and then looked around at everyone. She then looked up at her dad who stood on one side of her before looking at Tony who stood on the other. Suddenly, another thought of how eight was different than seven came to her.

On her last birthday she had wished for things to go back to the way they were. She had felt bad about it later, because she did like Tony and Tony had taken her to American Girl and it had felt like she'd been ungrateful.

Now, as she sucked in her breath and closed her eyes, Jemma wished for her dad and Tony and her new, very big family to always be together.

Jemma opened her eyes and blew out the candles, everyone cheering and applauding as she did. Smoke filled the air as the flames flickered out and she started waving it away as did her dad.

"Uh oh!" Peter said right as Jemma noticed it too, her stomach sinking. "You missed one. Guess your wish won't come true."

Jemma gasped. "But it has to," she mumbled, not wanting to let her friends see her cry. And she definitely wanted to cry thinking about her wish not coming true.

"What?" Tony said in a tone of disbelief. "Who told you that, Petey?" His hand squeezed her shoulder and Jemma looked up at him. "Everyone knows that's just a myth."

"What do you mean?" Leo asked.

"Well, uh, just that everyone thinks that you only get one shot to blow out all the candles, but really birthday wish magic works proportional to your age. That's to make it fair. I mean, imagine an old man like me having to blow out all of my candles at once for my wish to come true. That wouldn't be very fair would it?"

"I guess not," Tripp said.

"I mean, there's probably like fifty or more candles on there," Leo agreed with him. All of the adults, except Tony, and some of the older kids laughed.

"Well, not quite that many," Tony said, sounding a little less enthusiastic than before, "but still way more candles than just eight."

"So, Jemma gets seven more tries?" Peter asked.

"Yep," Tony answered and then smiled down at her. "So, go for it, birthday girl."

Jemma smiled and turned back toward the cake. She blew out the last candle and hoped Tony was right because seven-year-old her had been wrong. She didn't want things to go back to the way they were before her dad met him.

Once the candles were blown out Tony started pulling them from the cake while her dad grabbed a knife to start cutting slices.

"Woohoo! Time for cake!" Harley cheered, and some others joined in.

"Maybe we should wait until we've tasted it before we get too excited," Natasha teased.

"I'm sure it'll taste delicious," Jemma defended Steve and Clint. "It's too pretty not to. Oh! Can I get a selfie in front of the cake first?"

"Sure thing," Tony said.

"Her phone is in my back pocket," her dad said. Tony grabbed it and there were giggles from some of her friends.

"He touched his butt," Tripp said with a loud snicker.

"Correction," Tony said, handing her the phone to take a selfie, "I touched a phone that just happened to be near his butt. Not the same thing."

There was more laughter as Jemma snapped a few pictures and then gave her dad the okay to cut the cake.

Her dad sighed. "It almost feels wrong cutting up something so artistic, but okay. Since it's your cake, which slice do you want, sweetheart?"

Jemma studied the cake and then glanced at Pepper before looking up at her dad. "A piece with one of the hearts on it," she said, and pointed to the second tier.

Her dad cut out the piece and placed it on a plate before handing it to her. He then started cutting out pieces for the other birthday guests.

Jemma carefully carried the piece of cake over to where Pepper sat. Pepper blinked as if surprised. "For me?"

Jemma nodded. "Since it's a special day for you too."

Pepper took it with one hand and offered her a one armed hug. "Thank you."

"The secret?" Tony looked between them.

"Not for much longer," Pepper answered, smiling at her before looking at him. "Because Jemma is graciously allowing me to steal her spotlight. You see," she looked at Happy, "we have some news to share. As of a few days ago, we've been approved as potential adoptees."

"Wait, are you saying what I think you're saying?" Tony asked.

"I think she is," her dad said with a happy smile, having paused cutting up cake.

"We are," Pepper confirmed, Happy nodding beside her. "We might not be looking to adopt quite as many as the both of you have, but with any luck you'll need to make room for another guest or two."

"Although I'm not entirely against the idea of adopting _fourteen_ kids," Happy interjected.

"Please don't," her dad said with a laugh, "because then Tony will decide we need at least two more. People will think we're actually a part of some religious cult."

"Besides," Tony said, "we already kind of have fourteen. Sam couldn't make it, but he's still family."

"And probably always will be," Skye said with a wink and nudged Steve who sat beside her.

"Anyways," Steve said with a shake of his head before looking at Pepper and Happy, "I think the point here is our family is growing no matter how you look at it."

"Well said, Steve," Tony said and then picked up a glass of soda from the table. "Before we feast on this beautiful, and sure to be delicious, cake, here's to Pepper and Happy and their future children."

Jemma smiled at Pepper and gave her a hug.

 

* * *

 

Tony moved away from where Jemma was saying goodbye to all of her school friends, leaving her in Betty's capable care, to see where Bruce had wandered off too. He found him tidying up the table in an aimless fashion, a cup here and a plate there. Tony grabbed his own half-eaten second piece and started to finish it, watching Bruce do his thing for a few moments.

Finally, he asked, "So what's bothering you?" Bruce merely shrugged.

Tony looked down at his cake as he filled his plastic fork with another bite. "Is it still the make-up?" He shoved the cake into his mouth and glanced back at Bruce. He had stopped mid-reach for a plate.

"Maybe a little," Bruce finally spoke up, shaking his head a little. He then abandoned his quest for the plate, drawing back with a sigh. He sat down and said, "I don't know. Guess I'm just wondering about Jemma's birthday wish." Tony raised an eyebrow and moved to sit down in the seat across from him. "I don't think she's ever worried about not blowing out all of her candles before. That's not like her."

"Well, she's a kid and a growing one at that."

Bruce gave a rueful smile. "Don't remind me."

"Point is," Tony continued, setting down his empty plate and reaching for a napkin, "what she was like on her last birthday or even last week isn't necessarily going to be what she's like today or tomorrow."

"I know." Bruce nodded. "I know, I'm just—"

Tony tossed the used napkin onto the plate and reached across the table to take Bruce's fidgeting hands into his. "You're afraid of missing cues again, is that it?"

Bruce swallowed hard enough for Tony to see it in the way his prominent Adam's apple moved up and down. It was followed by a small nod that almost looked ashamed if Tony wasn't mistaken, but that didn't make sense because there was nothing to be ashamed of.

"What if I'm missing something again?"

"Then I've missed it too," Tony offered.

"Okay, but… What… what if that wish was something important that we should already know about?"

"Hey," Tony squeezed his hands, "just breathe. Remember the other night when the shoe was on the other foot? You reassured me that I was overreacting. That I was letting my worst fears get the better of me." Tony moved one of his hands to Bruce's cheek. "I'm sure that's all this is, Bruce. You're letting a past mistake mess with your head. For all you know, she wished for that bunny she really wanted earlier. That's probably pretty important to her right now. Or maybe she wished for world peace. Like I said, she's a kid so who knows?"

A smile touched Bruce's face. Tony ran his thumb down the slope of his cheek to touch the edge of it. "Probably the bunny," Bruce said as Tony pulled his hand back. "That makes sense. Also, good quick thinking with the seven more wishes thing. Seemed to do the trick."

"I certainly hope so. Even if it means we have to break down and buy a bunny for her."

Bruce snorted. "You already half-promised her," he pointed out.

"By the way, I don't really look like I'm in my fifties do I?" Tony quickly changed the subject with a playful pout, and Bruce rolled his eyes. "You're not just with me because you secretly have a daddy kink and I look the part, right?"

Bruce literally guffawed and shook his head. "Yeah, I think I've made it pretty clear by now that one of the reasons I'm with you is because you're a daddy. How did that intern put it? You're daddy as fuck, I think."

Tony tried to hold back his laughter, but he couldn't.

"But that's about as far as I'm willing to go with that," Bruce added more seriously after a moment. "And, no, you don't look that old. If anything, it's a little unfair that I'm younger than you, but nobody would hesitate to think it's the other way around."

Tony couldn't resist. "I guess that makes you _especially_ daddy as fuck," he said, hoping that sounded more seductive than ridiculous even if he was sure it didn't.

Bruce gave him a small smirk, the one that told Tony he had a retort in mind. "That is what the intern said."

"Oh, the intern said that, huh?" Tony leaned forward. "Drunk guys in elevators, interns… Maybe I should be concerned you're getting cold feet."

"I think you've slept with me long enough to know my feet don't get cold." Tony gave him an incredulous look. "Yeah, that wasn't my best comeback."

"It's true though." Tony chuckled and moved back. "You're not just hot, you're practically a furnace." He added an eye wiggle for good measure.

Bruce rolled his eyes and stood to his feet. "Not your best comeback either."

He started to move away from the table, probably to rejoin the others, but Tony jumped to his feet and headed him off before he could. "Forgot something," Tony said before pulling him into a kiss. He let his hand wander down Bruce's backside. When it reached its destination, Bruce gasped as if scandalized.

"You touched my butt."

Tony gave him the most lecherous smile he could manage and said, "Damn right, I did."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. As a quick refresher, Jemma and Leo had a fight in the last chapter of Step By Step. That's what their make-up scene is referring to in this chapter (so, time wise, that was June and this chapter is the beginning of September). 
> 
> 2\. For non-comic readers, in the comics, Pepper and Happy adopted two children (before shit hit the fan as it always does in comics because nobody can be happy for more than two minutes at a time). That bit of canon doesn't seem to get brought up very often (afaik in fics where they are only a minor pairing that is) so I wanted to bring it to this verse, and have hinted at it more than once prior to this (for a point of reference, near the end of Lucky Thirteen Pepper and Happy had decided to give adoption a try, so time wise it's taken them a little less than a year to go through the initial process of applying to various agencies. 
> 
> I won't be updating this fic until the beginning of next year sometime so if you don't read anything else of mine (or I fail at posting anything else) between now and then, Happy Holidays!


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